Is this the end?
by masterscreation
Summary: Rated for safety. The battle with Naraku has finally come to pass. But has the pain and sadness truly ended? Sesshomaru and Kagome pairing. Please R x R.
1. Prologue

_"Can I break away?_

_Push me away, make me fall_

_Just to see another side of me_

_Push me away, You can't see what I see_

_the other side of me."_

_-Trust Company 'Downfall'-_

It was a hopeless fight, they had were losing, if they had not already lost. Naraku was more powerful than the group had wanted to accept. Even with all of them attacking the demon from all sides, they seemed to not make one ounce of progress. Sango and Miroku stood side by side with Kilala large and fiery beside the humans protectively. Inu-yasha was no doubt standing next to Kagome, and surprisingly even the miko was fighting back with all she had. Firing a sacred arrow after each other, without much of a rest between each firing. Her arm had long ago gone numb from pain, her muscles firing spasms of lightning through her shoulders. She would have long ago run out of arrows, had not her surrogate son Shippou, skipped off around the forest and retrieved the arrows that had not stuck inside Naraku, and had not been broken by his attacks. Even the small kitsune, between retreiving her arrows and dodging attacks with the help of Kagome, fired his small amount of power towards the powerful demon. No longer did they fight against a puppet, the black-haired man in front of them was the true thing, no more fooling around, it was now or never. Naraku had half of the Shikon No Tama, the group had the other half. But still it was not enough. Their energy was starting to drain, and yet Naraku did not seem to lessen in his attacks against the ragged group.

All that truly mattered in the end, was that Naraku was somehow defeated, the Shikon No Tama returned to it's original shape, and purified from it's hidden evils. The details of the battle are not to be discussed at this current time, for it's horrible tale will come later on in such a story.

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Authors Note: I am well aware that this is a pathetic excuse for a prologue. But it may help to see it more as a quick overview of the start of the story. At the moment I do not wish to get into detail of the fight and what transpired after the battle, that will come at a later time.

For all those that read, please be patient as I upload chapters that are in larger magnitude than the one you see before you.


	2. Been long, has it not?

_"I could be cold  
I could be ruthless  
You know I could be just like you ."_

_-Three Days Grace 'Just Like You'-_

  
Kagome Higurashi, to those that had known her, would say that she had perished years ago. Would even go so far to say that she had been killed during her battle with Naraku. Such a comment might be able to be considered true, and false all at the same time. It wasn't best to worry one's brain over the enigma of such a statement. One would have to find the woman named Kagome Higurashi, and ask her the meaning of it. She hadn't been seen for almost six years in either time. Her family had by now considered her truly dead, as she had not appeared through the well in all that time. Even in Sengoku Jidai had forgotten the young miko that had surely changed the outcome of an extremely time period. If she had not defeated Naraku, all the inhabitants of the world would be doomed to death, or many things much worse. The Shikon No Tama would also strike a subject of speech when the phantom miko came into discussions. It had been returned to it's original state and purified by the miko powers that she held within her body. It was fought over whether or not she had made a wish, for some still dared to say that youkai and hanyou all alike could still feel the throbbing presence of the wish-giving jewel.  
  
The well was destroyed, not by Naraku, and not by a demon that wished to keep the miko in the past, hoping to get it's claws on the Shikon Jewel, when it had been found destroyed by the old priestess Kaede, she did not find the markings of a demon's destruction, but an arrow had been imbedded within the wells broken sides. Had it been the dead miko Kikyou who had destroyed it, or better yet, Kagome? So many questions surronded her, and yet it no longer seemed to matter to the miko. Nothing seemed to matter to the miko, who had lost everything that she had cared and come to care for. She lost her friends from the Feudal Era, she lost her family in modern-day Tokyo, she had been dragged through hell, and had come out the only one to survive.  
  
She rivaled even the most controlled demon with her mask of cruel coldness. Her face had lost it's childish plumpness and was returned with a womanly face, her cheekbones high, with a slender nose and full pink lips. Not that it was her mature beauty that could best a demon, it was the fact that her face seemed numb to emotion, if she had been seen at the most painful part of her life, besides the battle with Naraku, not even a sword through the belly would earn a reaction on her features. Pain, fear, apprehension, caution, none of the 'emotions' could change her features. They stayed frozen, fierce and thick. She did not hide from the world necessarily, but she no longer bounded into companionship, as her younger, more trusting self had done time after time. She was no longer the Kagome had captured the attention of so many with her innocence and purity, yet this could not be completely stated in truth either. She was still pure, and held some sort of innocence, but it seemed that the cruelty of fate and the world had stripped some of it away from her. She knew the world for what it was, and no longer seemed content to fight against the powers of darkness.  
  
Why should she? No matter how hard she fought, no matter how many died, evil was always present in the world, it was inevitable. She could fight for the rest of her life, and yet the darkness would always remain. So why fight? Such splendid love and trust of the world around her had been tarnished. And therefore, Kagome was nothing more than a wandering soul over the earth, with no purpose and no goals set to keep her from falling into the dark abyss that she had surronded herself in.  
  
------------  
  
_"Well momma told me,  
when I was young.  
Said sit beside me,  
my only son,  
and listen closely to what I say.  
And if you do this,  
it'll help you some sunny day.  
....Be a simple kind of man."  
  
-Shinedown 'Simple Man'-_  
  
Sesshomaru, Taiyoukai of the Western Lands, stood silently underneath the shade of the tree's branches. Golden eyes staring down at the simple marker of the dear one that had passed away. Actually, she had been gone for a few years, four to be exact. She had not died of an attack, no one had killed her out of evil intentions. She had retained a sickness, and her human body had not been able to fight off the disease. And neither had the great demon been able to save her, no longer did his sword of life, bring exactly that. It had refused to slash away the gremlins that had started to drag off Rin's soul. It had betrayed him. He had to bury the ningen girl that had changed his life for the better, even if he hated to admit it. The shell that he had started to peel himself out of, the emotions that he had started to show, all disappeared with the death of the girl.  
  
Jaken though was still around, much to the bitter sniveling of Sesshomaru. Sometimes he truly began to wonder why he kept the toad-demon around, he was truly disgusting and really held not much power to be reckoned with. He was annoying to the brink of tears, boring in everything he said, a coward and to boot he usually brought them into more trouble than was necessary. At such an unwanted thought, the toad was somehow summoned to his Masters side. With a tentative clearing of his throat, his three-fingered hand grasping tightly at the Two-Headed Staff, he took a grip of Sesshomaru's pure white clothing and gave a tug.  
  
"Lord Sess-shomaru? I cannot bare to be the bearer of bad news, but there are rumors of a youkai uprising on the Southern borders."  
  
The tall taiyoukai turned with swift, precise steps, letting his booted foot collide with the toad's face as he continued his steps. An uprising? It would do him well to release some of his pent-up energy from months of inactivity. With an impassive face, the cloud was summoned under said feet as he rocketed up into the clear skies. The ki of other demons brushed across his pale skin as he neared the border, but strangely enough, the energy that he felt arising from that particular area was not entirely consisted of demons. No, not demon at all, but not yet entirely human either. It was familiar, which did not bode well for the Lord Taiyoukai, he did not like the fact that it was familiar. Not at all.  
  
He landed down to find a single figure amongst the growing amount of fur and fangs. To normal sight the figure looked nothing more than human. Dull fingernails, half-blind eyes. Dull teeth and such. On even closer inspection, the ningen was of a female gender, whirling around in defense, a blade flashing dully in the muted sunlight. Tetsuiga? He could not pinpoint why this human was so familiar, and was just as confused at the sight of his father's fang. Why of all people would a lowly human be weilding the sword as if she owned it? Yet it was her expertise with the sword that eliminated most of the youkai in her presence, but it was the bright flash of miko power, purifying those nearest to her into ashes, that tipped the scales and ended the battle. With only one remaining, and in fear of the Miko power, it fled into the forest.  
  
Raven black hair whipped around once more, flaring up in the airs currents. Dark blue eyes latched onto his cold golden one's without as much as a simple emotion crossing over her cream features.  
  
"Lord Sesshomaru, it has been many years has it not?"

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Authors Note: I am quite aware that I may have portrayed things incorrectly. As well as might have even mis-spelled a few words in the process. I assure you all that I have tried to be as accurate as I could be, but I will now take this time to state that in no way, form, or shape do I own Inuyasha and the rest of both story and idea. What I have written is only what I wish to happen. I will go ahead and take the time to sincerely thank those that read and review.


	3. Still haven't learned

_"Show me how it ends.  
It's alright, show me defenseless you really are,  
satisfied and empty inside.  
That's alright, let's give this another try,  
if you find your family don't you cry."  
  
-Breaking Benjamin 'So Cold'-_  
  
Not only was the tall Lord taken by surprise that this ningen recognized him, but surprised as well when the feel of familiarity spiked within his form. Of course, since he had no doubt perfected the art of masking his emotions, no such thing flickered across his face. It remained just as cold and ruthless as it did on a normal basis. He narrowed his eyes together, watching the miko with what could only be described as indifference.  
  
"And I command that you tell me now how it is that you know me."  
  
The woman's features did not change from their stoic expression. Giving him an even harder time to pinpoint exactly in his memory where she came from. He had never met a human that had such command over her emotions, if he had, he would have remembered with the upmost clarity. He watched as her dark head tilted to the side, it might have counted for confusion if it had been on any other face, but hers it looked like nothing more than a movement of her body.  
  
"I would be disappointed if you knew me with only a slight glance in my direction. Truly disappointed if you had remembered such a trivial being as myself. But this might be able to jar your memory Lord Sesshomaru."  
  
Pulling a bow that he had yet to see towards her front side, cocking an arrow into the string and pulling the string taunt till it seemed her bow might break with the tension. Now, what he saw then, was not a smile, nor an expression of emotion, it was a smirk, yet empty of the sarcarsm and menace that he would have normally flaunted. Hell, this woman was more cold with her emotions than he was, and that indeed was a hard feat to accomplish.  
  
"Hai, Inu-yasha's miko wench. I can sense that you have yet to bed the half-breed. What happened, did he rut with the dead-one?"  
  
He had at most expected to see hurt flash across her features, or maybe even indignation. He had even been tempted to put his hand over one of his ears, knowing that any moment she would blush and scream that it was none of his business. What he was not ready for, was for that strong hand to let go of the string and watch with cold eyes as the arrow was let loose. The taiyoukai should have seen it coming, should have been able to prevent the arrow complete it's path. But he felt disoriented, as if he watched the arrows movements in a fog, and had no way of preventing it's piercing goal.  
  
He was thrown against the tree, the arrow lodged deeply in his right shoulder. Of course, he tried to move, tried to dislodge himself from the bark, but found that he could barely move. He fought off the spell of sleep that was starting to fall over him, but did not try to fight off the deep anger and rage that was starting to make his golden gaze bleed red.  
  
"HOW DARE YOU IDIOTIC BI----"  
  
His words were cut off when the miko approached him, her hand pulled back with such tension in her shoulders, he at first imagined she was made as a bow, before her momentum was released and the palm of her petite hand pulled flush against his cheek. Claw marks marred his beautiful skin, and he could actually feel the sting of pain. And yet even now, nothing trespassed across her stoic face.  
  
"You would do well to remember that I am no longer the wench you met so long ago. I am one that demands respect as much as you do Lord Sesshomaru...."  
  
She hissed out, emphasizing Lord with her human teeth bared. This brought a reaction from the demon, and he did nothing to hide his shock as his mouth seemed to settle into a tight clasp, a slender eyebrow rising up in question. Since when did he take such abuse from a human?  
  
Her hand reached out and flickered the edge of her arrow with narrowed eyes. She locked her frozen blue with his own melted gold, anger swimming in the depths of his glare. "Now this does seem truly familiar. If I had not known any better Lord Sesshomaru, you are starting to follow in the footsteps of your brother, pinned to a tree under the spell of a miko. Nostaglic ne?"  
  
She took a step back, as if she had seen the demon struggle against the arrow, in vain of course.  
  
"I will leave you to your own thoughts for the day. I will return tomorrow, and I expect that you have calmed by then and will be able to speak with me in a mature manner, or I will be forced to gift upon you much pain."  
  
----------  
  
_"You stole my passion,  
Burned my everything.  
Their all the same here,  
Locked up change deep inside."_

_-Cold 'Sick of Man'-_  
  
Kagome had even surprised herself with how she had handled the Taiyoukai. She had almost expected her oldself to emerge and cringe in fright from his rage, almost expected him to be the one to shatter her mask. If the offer of friendship could not break it, if sorrow shared could not, than at least maybe rage in her direction, but still to no avail.  
  
She had not even presumed she would reveal herself to the demon. while at the last few months before the battle with Naraku waged, Sesshomaru had seemed to slowly open up to his brother, and even Kagome, during the battle, he had never been seen. She was bitter towards him for that, but now was not the time to dweal on it, it would change nothing. What it was that had snapped her cool interior, and had urged her into action against him, was his comment about Inu-yasha and Kikyou. Even after six years, it was still an extremely sore subject for her that she hid tightly under her skin.  
  
Not even her scent would have betrayed her feelings towards the demon. And yet she would remain true to her word. On the dawn of the next day, she would return to the tree and pull the arrow from his shoulder and let him free. What he did after that was his own accord, but whatever it was she would deal with it when it came. If her strange trust and large love before the battle had confused demons and humans alike, truly her now calm exterior with a frozen interior was just as confusing. No matter what form, no matter what mentality, she would always and forever remain an enigma to those outside of her person.  
  
She sat silently in front of the burnt out fire, her person sitting on the fabric of her sleeping bag, her legs tucked carefully under her weight. She didn't seem to need the fire for anything particular. The season was warm, and even the nights could be muggy. She had no need for the light, as her senses had become slightly enhanced in her years of lonely traveling. Nor was there fish or some sort of food that she would need to cook. The fire wasn't needed, it was only a symbol of memories long gone. Had the group not huddled up to the fires to enjoy each others company?  
  
Turning her gaze away from the burnt embers, she pushed her legs into the warmth of the sleeping bag, letting her upper body fall back against the ground as she tucked one arm under her head, the other resting against the flat of her stomach.  
  
Why did she even bother speaking with Sesshomaru? She felt no need to befriend him, or even converse with him. 'Was it because he was the only one left that remembered me?'  
  
Flicking the idea away with a swift shake of her ebony head, Kagome rested onto her side, her face remaining frozen as she slowly slipped into a sleep that was neither full of dreams or nightmares. A false facade of what sleep used to be to her. It did not restore her energy, nor give her hopeful images of the future. It was only a way for her to pass the time by.  
  
-------  
  
_"I take you where you want to go,  
I give you all you need to know,  
I drag you down I use you up.  
Mr. Self-destruct."  
  
-Nine Inch Nails 'Mr. Self-destruct.'-_  
  
True, the human girl Rin had opened Sesshomaru to many different emotions and feelings, even more true that she had softened the taiyoukai, even if it wasn't as noticeable as some would like, it would be a lie to say that he had completely hardened back to his original stoniness since her death. She had shown him in her small span of life, that at some point emotions had to be shown, some of it had to be vented or surely the soul would rot. He didn't know quite why he had mentioned Inu-yasha and Kikyou. He felt no need to outright cause her emotional pain. He felt no strong urge to grip her heart in his hand and squeeze till she bleed tears. It had just slipped. Was it that he was distressed by the fact she could hide her emotions better than he?  
  
Her scent was composed of nothing more than her physical scent. No emotional twinge. No strong surge of pain, anger or hatred in her smell. It was just.... a scent of eartly musk and muted rosemary. Though it had taken till later that night till he had noticed the change in her scent. Before, when she had been her bubbly, emotional self she had smelled of sweet honeysuckle and lavender. It was a warm and exciting scent, but now her scent was calm and collected. How indeed had that happened? Had she changed so much in.... five, six years? What happened that made her the way she was?  
  
What happened during the battle with Naraku and afterwards?  
  
These questions plagued his mind all through-out the night and deep into the next day. He had by than forgotten that the miko was to return to free him from his current position. He hated to admit that he was no longer in a rage for the way he had been treated, no more than an irritated curiosity to find out why she had reacted the way she did to him. He had been currently pulled deep into his thoughts when he finally heard the voice of the woman he was so currently bent on deciphering.  
  
"I see that the elements have treated you kind during the night. It would be a shame to think that the weather would have turned from it's comfortable warmth to chill or even the threat of a rainstorm. I have come to the conclusion that it is quite uncomfortable and unrational to have to walk about in drenched fabric. Do you not agree Lord Sesshomaru?"  
  
He turned to peek upon the form of the Miko as she stood in front of him once again. She was dressed in a top that favored the design of a kimono, but instead of falling down in the form of a skirt, it was disconnected from the pants that she wore on her legs. It was not the expected color of blue to match her eyes, nor white, which would seem to have matched her personality, a few years ago. But the fabric was tinged black, with no added decorations or patterns. Simple. Her petite feet were hidden in plain black boots that rode up to right below her knee's. Her long tresses had been restricted at the nape of her neck in a low ponytail by a slice of fabric. She was definitely not as he had originally remembered her. He couldn't believe that he had not noticed the extreme difference in her from his first encounter with her yesterday. Maybe than he wouldn't have been so careless with his words.  
  
"Release me human. I tire of my body numbed by your arrow. You would do well to remember your place, and exactly who you are dealing with."  
  
Of course, as soon as he said these exact words, he was aware that they were probably the wrong one's to say. It had been his arrogance and mouth that had gotten him into this prediciment to being with. He did not dare show his exasperation at being pinned to the tree, or his inability to speak nothing else but cruelty and surperiority.  
  
"I see that even after a night to this tree you have still not learner that it is how you treat others that determines how you in return are treated. Does this mean that I must leave you to this tree for another night of contemplation Lord Sesshomaru?"

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Authors Note: This Chapter is slightly better than the others ne? I am also aware that Kagome might seem more cold than others might like, as well as Sesshomaru seemingly more forgiving of what has happened to him. I hope that their personalities will level out the more thatn I write of them. It only needs time.


	4. Memories resurfaced

_"Listen to each drop of rain,  
Whispering secrets in rain. Franticly searching for someone to hear,  
That story be more than it hides,  
Each droplet long gone?  
Can't we stay for a while?  
It's just to hard to say goodbye Listen to the rain."  
  
-Evanescence 'Listen to the Rain'-_  
  
Kagome stood silently once again in front of the taiyoukai. And once again, she was surprised not only by her reactions, but by his as well. Years ago, had someone such as her pinned him to the tree with an arrow, death to the trespasser would have been swift and sure, now he almost seemed docile as he stood there calmly. Lord Sesshomaru docile? She would see once she unpinned him from the tree.  
  
"This Sesshomaru does not learn a lesson from a lowly miko. This Sesshomaru only learns what he truly wishes to learn."  
  
At this, Kagome's dark brow pulled up into a questioning sort of glare, matching quite nicely the one that he had given her not even a few minutes ago. Years ago, she might have giggled to hear him talk of himself as he did, third-person perspective. It would have just tickled her fancy to hear his alarmingly beautiful voice speak as it just had. Now, it only served to remind her that Lord Sesshomaru would never learn a lesson that he himself didn't teach.  
  
"Hai, well I did say that I would pull you from the tree this day, and although I notice you have learned nothing at all, I shall keep my word. For that is all that we left, when we have lost it all ne?"  
  
She stepped forward, her hand firm on the shaft of the arrow. As her muscles tightened down, and she was close to ripping it from his shoulder, a lavender light flooded down the shaft and into the form of Sesshomaru. The arrow was placed into her quiver, she would be able to use it again, if she did not have to sharpen the arrowhead before she did so. She watched as the taiyoukai rubbed at his shoulder, only to find that the wound was gone. He turned quizzical eyes towards the miko. She had healed him as she had pulled the arrow away. Surprised to find that her back was turned to him and she was quietly making her way far from him.  
  
"I did not say you were free to go MIKO!!"  
  
Kagome would have said she was shocked to hear such anger and irritation coming from the demon, but she wasn't. She did not suppose that he would forget that he had been pinned to a tree for a full night. That Sesshomaru never forgave things such as that. She could barely hear the movement of his booted feet on the ground as he came towards her. He was going to grab her no less, and kill her for her ningen ways.  
  
Of course before his arm could wrap around her and pin her to some stationary item, she crouched low, feeling her muscles bunch in her legs before she let them recoil, releasing her into the air. She tucked her knees to her chest, flipping two times in the air before she landed behind the taiyoukai. His surprise was apparent, but it wasn't enough to throw him off track. He whipped about quickly, slashing his claws effectively in front of him. Kagome jumped back, only the front of her shirt suffering from his claws. Revealing creamy patches of skin at her collarbone and across her stomach, she jumped farther back again till she was pressed against the same tree that she had pinned Sesshomaru to.  
  
The bleeding-red eyes of the demon flickered in surprise when her skin was revealed to his eyes. He could smell the blood that pumped quickly underneath such an expanse of skin, and he wanted to taste it. While he did not harbor immense feelings of rage towards the miko, he wanted to taste her blood, and decide if it too had undergone a change as it's mistress had. He quickly followed up with his claws, as he used his massive body to keep her close to the bark of the tree.  
  
"Nostalgic ne? I was beginning to wonder if you miko, follow in the same steps as my bastard brother."  
  
Using her own words against her, he pulled his claws up across her cheek, his own heartbeat ragged in his chest. The demon wanted to burst out so bad and just rip the tender flesh of her throat away. While his senses told him that her heartbeat had sped up from her movements, he could still not sense fear from her, nor the hot waves of anger. What was with her? In a roar of frustration, he pulled his claws back, only to shove them literally through her left shoulder, till he could feel his claws imbed into the bark. He expected some sort of scream, or spike in her scent, but neither of these things occured. She remained just as impassive as ever, though her dark blood ran in rivulets down his wrist and arm to puddle beneath.  
  
Inside of course, Kagome growled at the pain that flared throughout her shoulder. She had a higher pain threshold, she knew how to control her emotions to an irritating level, but that did not mean that she did not feel pain. And this pain in her shoulder was immense. In his actions he had completely torn her muscles from their bone, not to mention the force of his blow had broken the collarbone. Inwardly she bit her lip, inwardly she started to scream from the pain that slowly started to build in force, but Sesshomaru would never sense any of it. Instead, all he could sense, was that she took a deep breathe, before she finally forced it to speak.  
  
"Gomen Lord Sesshomaru for pinning you to this tree overnight. Forgive this miko for her actions."  
  
She tilted her head back as she felt her vision fade from her lose of blood. She wanted to fight against it, but the prospect of being completely out, where she could not feel one thing, or anything at all was too promising. Sesshomaru, the Lord of the Western lands, stared at the miko with open shock at her words as she lost consciousness.  
  
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_"Good morning day,  
sorry I'm not there.  
But all my favorite friends,  
vanished in the air.  
It's hard to fly when you can't even run,  
Once I had the world, but now I've got no one."  
  
-Three Days Grace 'Drown'-_  
  
She had assumed her unconsciousness would be blissful, black and void of memories or emotions from the past. The young miko was sorely wrong, and paid dearly for letting herself pass from the world of the aware. The blackness had started out as nothing more. A thick cloud of hue that surronded her as she slept of the pain of her injury, her miko powers slowly healing the damage. _But than a form stepped from the clouds, the instant flash of white and red making the miko reel back. Soon, it was none other than the hanyou Inu-yasha that stepped up to her. His golden eyes were swimming with tears, his face streaked already with the liquid. She could see it in his eyes, she did not even have to look towards the dead miko behind him. He took his hand gingerly in his own clawed grasp.  
  
'Kagome....'  
  
She closed her eyes harshly, knowing what it was that he was going to speak to her with. She felt tears prick at her own eyes, which she had tried desperately to flick away without another thought. Why could she not keep this dead demeanor about her when he was standing in front of her? He pulled the reluctant girl into his embrace, his arms tight across her back, his face buried into the strands of her dark hair. She could hear him inhale her scent as deep as possible. Did he not want to forget about her? Did he really wish to drag a piece of her down into hell with him?  
  
She broke down, sobbing into his shoulder, clutching at the fabric as if she would never let go. She wanted to pin him to the tree so that he couldn't go to hell with Kikyou, she wanted to scream and shout against his chest. Fling curses his way. But she could not, it wasn't within her to do such things. He had made his choice, and she would not be selfish by requiring him to stay.  
  
'I have decided Kagome. I am going to accompany Kikyou to hell. I wish I could stay here with you, for all time, and protect you from everything. But I owe her....'  
  
He was silenced when Kagome pushed him away from her body. She would not hear him say that he owned the dead priestess his life. She would not stand to hear such words.  
  
'Inu-yasha, do not treat as I am a stupid child. I know that you still love her, I know that I was only a passing face to you. I am well aware that I could never bring force those same feelings from you, towards me...'  
  
She refused to meet his gaze as he stood up, looking to her with pain and hurt deep in his golden eyes. He had pushed her away many times, he never expected for Kagome to push him away. He watched the silver tears fall from her eyes as she refused to meet his gaze. 'It would be to selfish of me to ask that you be truthful with your emotions towards me ne?'  
  
She sobbed as she pulled her bow from her back. If he was to go to hell with Kikyou, she would not watch him be pulled down by the dead priestess. She herself would be the one to send him there. With a calmness she reached over her shoulder and pulled forth from her quiver a single arrow. Notching it only the string, she let the bow remain at her side.  
  
'Go Inu-yasha, join your loved one's side so that I may be able to send you there. It will be the quickest.'  
  
She could feel his golden gaze on her, so she finally tilted her eyes up to meet with his. She could barely think through all the tears, could barely breathe with the look that he gave her than. He was pained, he truly did wish to stay with her, he had loved them both. Inu-yasha had loved Kagome, but his debt to Kikyou must be repayed. It was enough to turn her arrow on herself and end it all. She dropped her bow as she slung herself into his arms. She felt them wrap around her waist in urgency as she pressed her entire length against him. She felt him tilt her head back, looking down into her eyes. With little time left, he pressed his lips against her own, in a good-bye kiss. It was chaste, but it reflected the love that they held for each other. It didn't matter that the dead priestess was behind them, fuming in anger, it didn't matter that it was the last time.... just the kiss.  
  
No one truly broke the hold, they just suddenly found themselves apart, Kagome once again holding the bow tight in her hands. She wiped away her tears as her lips burned from the kiss. She would not miss, her shot would be true and swift, this was all that she could do for her first love. He stood beside Kikyou, but did not embrace her as Kagome had originally thought. He let his gaze lock onto hers, he would not even blink. He wished his last memory, his last image to be of Kagome, standing in the clearing with her legs spread in stature, the bow held expertly in her delicate hands. The rough winds blew her hair out and around her, creating an image of power and strength. He even watched her strange clothes flicker in the winds.  
  
'Good-bye.... my love.'  
  
It was said by both. Kagome's mouth flickering in time with his. Their sad voices mingled in the air in front of them. With a final gasp of air from Kagome, she let the arrow loose, watching it fly it's path till it pierced the chest of Inu-yasha, effectively piercing his heart. No pain flashed across his face, just a dying look of adoration towards Kagome. A burst of miko power flared from the arrow, destroying Inu-yasha's body into ash, as it took the dead priestess as well.  
  
As soon as the light was gone, Kagome collapsed onto the ground, her bow forgotten as she screamed out her pain into the vacant air around her.  
_  
"..............."  
  
Kagome's eyes flickered in the light that poured from the open window. She could feel tears squeeze out of the corner of her eyes as she came into wakingfulness. She whimpered, lifting her hands to wipe at her tears, her one hand made it well to her face, but her left hand had trouble making it up. Her eyes snapped open, as she looked towards her left shoulder. It was bandaged, the white gauze-like fabric wrapped around her upper chest as well. It took her long enough for her to figure out why she was bandaged up like she was, before of course memory of the previous actions flooded her senses.  
  
"Finally awake? Lazy miko, never seen someone sleep through a whole day...."  
  
She flickered her gaze over to the side, alighting on the form of Sesshomaru as he leaned against the wall of the room she was currently inhabiting. He said nothing about her tears, nor the noises that she made in her sleep. He would wait to question her about them later. _'As if you care about what happened! Kick her out at this very moment!!'_ Squishing his demonic voice between two mental fingers, he looked over Kagome once more before exiting the room, stalking his way to his study with precision and grace.  
  
Kagome was left to flop back onto the bed ungracefully and sigh as she tugged the blankets closer to her chin.

----------

Authors Note: Better? Longer? I would most appreciate to receive reviews.


	5. Pay me back!

_"I've gotta let her go (What happened.)  
(What happened then.)  
Never let it up, let it up, let it up.  
Ah! Let it up. I dont want this to go away (Go away.)  
I'm so scared (Going away.)  
I can't stand what's going on (It's going away.)  
We all crumble (It's still gonna go away.)  
(It's still gonna go away.)  
We crumble under pressure (pressure.)  
Pressure (pressure.)  
I can't go living on..."  
  
-Korn 'It's Gonna Go Away'-_  
  
After the miko had passed out from blood loss at the tree, Sesshomaru had battled with himself as to what action he should take._ 'Leave her to die.'_ It was simple, easy and could not complicate his life. So why did he feel so guilty when he had first walked away from her fallen form? Could it be that she really wasn't the ningen that had annoyed him so many years ago? Her emotions did not overwhelm her as they had in the past, nor did it seem her annoying loyalty to his half-brother remained, but he could not place why it was she was no longer at his side. But than again, could he really say that he hated her even then? She had not intently tried to harm him, she only wished to protect Inu-yasha and her friends from his wrath. She had never outwardly attacked him, and at times he hated to admit that she intrigued him.  
  
With a growl he had returned to the miko's side and without concern slung her body over his shoulder. Of course the one that was not spiked with armor, it would not do well to further injur the woman. Why he cared, he would not dare to follow-up with hours of thought. He presumed it was only because she had held her own against him, and therefore earned some sort of respect, even if it was marginal. She was still a ningen.  
  
A human that Rin had adored, a human that had battled many demons for the good of the world. A human who had sacrificed more than anyone else would in order to beat Naraku. A human, that no matter how many times she was attacked, could never truly be comfortable with the idea of killing anyone, even a demon. She was a strange one to say the least, more so now that she had suddenly reappeared after years of absence. The cloud had formed without much of a stray thought from the taiyoukai before he had taken to air, whisking over the treetops. He did not have to go far, since the miko had trespassed on his own land. Why was she there exactly?  
  
He would not have sacrificed the purity of his private balcony to land upon, no matter how physically injured the miko had been, instead he had landed right at the front entrance, and had walked quickly into the waiting halls. He never shouted, barely even raised a voice unless he was provoked. His servants had been trained to come running even if he barely whispered their name. It soon developed into the point where the servants would meet him at the door when they were aware of his arrival. Sakuya, a neko youkai had been the first to reach her Masters side. Handing over the miko, he had spewed out directions.  
  
"Take her to one of the empty guest rooms and clean her wound. If she wakes up and protests, I don't care what you do, just keep her from bothering me."  
  
He hadn't even waited to see the servants reactions, just retreated to the safety of his room, where he launched himself into the private springs. The miko's scent was all over him, as well as the copper scent of her blood. It was vile! Forget that it was a curious scent, the pure fact that she was human had him clawing at his own flesh to rid himself of it. His clothing wasn't even retrievable. He would have to reprimand the miko for bleeding on him, to think that she had the right to do such a thing. He threw them to the fire, and instead dressed himself in a pure white outfit, with no sign of color or decoration, just as the miko's had been.  
  
It would have been quite a sight to see the Lord of the Western Lands as he exited the water. Sun-red from his scrubbings, his hair dripping wet around his shoulders, his face contorted with the anger of having to burn his favorite clothing. He had entertained the idea of striding into the guest room, and throwing the miko out of the window, curious to see if she might land on her feet in agility, or hit the ground with her backside. He had spent most of the next few moments sorting through different scenario's, all of which brought some sort of morbid smile to his face.  
  
That is until the neko youkai Sakuya knocked onto his door. When he gave her permission to enter, she bowed before her, her head lower respectively to keep her eyes from his.  
  
"The miko has been cleaned and bandaged. She is still in sleep, but she should be awakening soon. Should I send her on her way when she revives?"  
  
It had been an innocent question, but Sesshomaru had stood up and walked out of his room past the girl. No, he would do it himself. He stalked down the corridor, his hand twitching with the urge to fling her from his abode and scrub the entire room of her presence. It had truly been in his plan to rid her, but when he had entered (alone of course) the sight in front of him prevented any logical thought to cross further in his mind.  
  
The miko was on the bed, her shoulders and upper chest bandaged from her wound. Her brow was drenched in sweat, curling the small hairs closest to her temples from the heat. Her entire body was softly thrashing around, her face contorted in pain and despair. He had crouched down and made his way closer to her bedside, watching as she moved about restlessly. He could not be sure what it was that had her in such a bind, but he couldn't help but stare at her mouth as he heard her words.  
  
_'Good-bye....my love.'_  
  
Was she dreaming of Inu-yasha? He jumped back, almost out of his skin when she screamed, pressing his back against the wall, his heart-beat was lashing against his ribcage ferociously. He would not admit that her sudden noise had scared him from his calm outside. Her scent was laced heavily with her emotions, making the Lord grow weak in the knee's at the overwhelming intensity of it all.  
  
He could hear her start to awaken, her whimpers did not escape his sensitive hearing. Steeling himself to look as impassive and calm as always, he leaned against the wall, though his heart was still hammering. Now, he was curious. Why did Inu-yasha cause her such violent and dreadful nightmares? All thoughts of tossing her from the bed and out the window, was quite literally destroyed. It was only curiousity that kept him from ridding himself of her, nothing else.  
  
"Finally awake? Lazy miko, never seen someone sleep through a whole day...."  
  
That was all that he could think to say at the moment, watching as her blue eyes flashed over to hold his own gaze. He growled, but she could not hear it with her dull senses.'Do you not eye me such as that!' Was what he wanted to say, but instead he turned on the balls of his feet and exited quickly. He would retreat to his study for the rest of the day, he did have matters of his land to ponder over, much more important than a miko to be sure.  
  
He could not help if his steps seemed much more than just a lazy move. As soon as he was in his study, to where her scent from earlier did not tickle his senses, he collapsed in his chair, feeling his tail move about in agitation. _'How dare she scream so loud. Does she not know that she could have ruptured this Sesshomaru's ears?'  
  
_"Feh...."  
  
He grumbled, before placing his chin on his clenched fist. He stared at the parchment that he should be paying attention to, but found his concentration slipping as his thoughts started to wander to the miko. His feet tapped hopelessly against the floor as he mentally grumbled and whined over his conflicting emotions. So deep in thought that he did not feel the miko once again awaken, even from this distance. He wasn't even aware as her scent became stronger, didn't even hear the soft knock on the double doors, didn't notice her booted feet step towards him. Only he noticed when her blue eyes were so close to his.  
  
Practically jumping back from surprise, but having the ability to hide such a quick reaction, he stared at the miko, as she was once again dressed in her torn shirt. Her hair was once again smoothed back. If not for the rip in her shirt, and the slight peek of bandage under the shirt, he would have sworn she had never been injured.  
  
"Arigato Lord Sesshomaru for bandaging my wound and letting me rest. I will now find my way out of your life and return to the woods."  
  
She turned as if she naturally pivoted about her whole life, letting the demon to admire how her ponytail moved to her actions. He even watched until she neared the door, but seemed to snap out of his thoughts while her hand was held up. Jumping up to his feet, he slammed his palm down onto the desk.  
  
"This Sesshomaru is not through with you miko. You owe me for what I have done."  
  
He wanted to inwardly clap his hand over his mouth, and hope that she had not heard what he had just said. Not that he feared her reaction, he feared why he had reacted as he had. He should be glad that she would leave so quickly without a fight or an arguement. He would have had no problem watching her walk out off the premises and disappear forever, but he had yet to have his curiosity filled! He watched as she looked over her shoulder, her calm face almost irritating him to the brink of anger.  
  
"Oh, and what is it that you would have me to in return for my debt?"  
  
He was shocked to say the least, that she did not fight against his words. She knew that she was in his debt for helping her, she knew that he could state how to be repayed, and do it without so much a second thought. He hadn't even meant to say what he had, but the sudden prospect of not having what he wanted ate at him. He wanted answers. His eyes flickered back and forth, though she would not be able to see since his head was slightly bent down. What could he ask of her, that he would be able to permit without too much revulsion?  
  
Looking down to the stump that was left of his arm, a wicked grin spread across his mental features.  
  
"For helping you in your time of need, you must give me back my arm, which was stolen from me by Inu-yasha."  
  
----------  
  
Authors Note:  
  
ScreaminChild: Well, considering that this story has been up for barely a day, I think I have done well with updating, since I added three chapters in one day. But I will indeed try to update as fast as I can possibly whip-up another chapter. Thank you for your advice and your review.  
  
.


	6. This Sesshomaru, This Miko

_"To others the pain was obvious  
The colours of shame a bruise - unjust  
Abuse of trust can't be wiped  
I can't remember why,  
I chose to say goodbye  
I'm terrified of what, I  
might have severed  
I tried to forget the drowning truth,  
Lashing inside my sea of youth  
Life seemed a fair sacrifice for peace."_

_-Delerium 'Wisdom'-_  
  
She had known it wouldn't have been so easy to escape Sesshomaru, though it wasn't necessarily escape that she was wishing. But she was aware she couldn't just walk away from the taiyoukai, even on her own accord. She might have frozen during the past years, but she still held some speck of honor, and knew that she was in his debt. She had strode into his office with no fear and little apprehension. But it was as if she was facing her childhood nightmare. Lord Sesshomaru had attempted to steal her life and those of her friends so many times, it was as if he was her personal Boogey-man. It was as well that she had turned her back to him as she exited, because she was in quite a bit of shock when she heard what it was that she was to repay him with.  
  
Yes, she had miko powers, and true over the last six years they had grown in intensity, and even more true, she did have the Shikon No Tama buried deep within her body once again, but to think that the taiyoukai would even trust her with such a thing. How could he be sure that she would not try to purify him instead? _'He does not trust..'_ That was the simple answer...but still. In order for her to return his arm, she would have to be close to him, plant her hands on him, and that idea brought the disgusted face of Sesshomaru into her mind, replaying a scene of imagination that might have made her laugh years ago...  
  
_'This Sesshomaru does not allow anyone to touch him. This Sesshomaru does not need a ningen to restore what has been lost' Saying as such with his arm crossed over his chest, and his golden eyes cold with icy anger._ This was what her imagination came up with.  
  
Aye, it was true that his actions were confusing her inner self to the brink of madness. Had the past six years been eventful for him? Had he changed somewhat just as she had? Question was, or at least even more important, was what had made him change to the way he was now?  
  
In her silent thoughts, one word peeked out of dark thoughts. _'Rin.'_ She had yet to see or hear the energetic girl running about the halls. She had yet to hear the toad-demon Jaken blasting away obscenities about her rompings about the grounds. A frown developed across her face, but it no longer mattered as she was the only one walking through the corridors, so that she might be able to receive more rest. She did not know when the taiyoukai would be demanding his arm.  
  
Rin had been the source of forever smiles and sunshine, she had been the one that had started the change in Sesshomaru to begin with, but if she was no longer here, than praytell why was Sesshomaru not a large block of ice, killing the first thing that crossed his path? Once again entering her temporary rooms, the servant who had wrapped up her bandage was standing there waiting for the miko to return.  
  
Kagome took in the neko youkai in front of her, who's long hair was the strangest mixture of golden cream. Her eyes of course were a green hue that could make an emerald jealous. She was sure had the servant had her hands uncurled from in front of her, she would see delicate claws. She wore a kimono the color of the sun, though the fabric was of lesser quality, because of course she was just a servant.  
  
"It has been requested that you bathe and dress yourself properly before dinner is served tonight. Lord Sesshomaru has given you permission to eat at the same table as him for your stay."  
  
Kagome nodded in agreement as she followed the woman from the room and down the hall, till she was ushered into a larger room, with four different springs waiting.  
  
"This is where you shall bathe for as long as you stay here. You are allowed to visit them as you see fit. Salts and soaps are placed over to the right of every spring, and your clothes will always be laid out farthest from the water so that they are not endangered."  
  
With that she bowed out quickly and left the miko to marvel at what was before her. Quickly stripping away the remander of her clothing, she slipped into the nearest spring. She might not have as much free emotion as before, but she did remain to have modesty, and she was thankful the servant had not stayed for longer than she was needed.  
  
A sigh escaped past her pink lips as she let the warmth of the water soak into her limbs and restore some of her limbs mobibility. Letting her hip-length hair loose, so that it spread out behind her in the water, she leaned back and let her body float in the water like a lily. She dared not look at the scars that had started to appear on her body from her years in Sengoku Jidai. From fighting demons, from fearful runs through the forest. Some of them had no doubt come from the final battle with Naraku. The rest of course had come from her last six years as a wandering soul.  
  
She tried to keep all thoughts of Lord Sesshomaru from her mind. She could at least spend this time in the water by relaxing, and forgetting of her current problems. But of course, it would not stay where she pushed it to the back of her mind. She would repay her debt to the taiyoukai, but restoring him his arm was going to be harder than he might have originally thought. She would have to take precautions, just in case her powers raged out of control. With a growl of frustration that was silent enough for only her ears to hear, she resumed her bathing, till she was ruby red from her administrations.  
  
Slipping from the still warm water, she wrapped a thin towel around her frame as she padded over to wear her temporary clothing was laid out. A true kimono of black hue, with ivy detail around the neck, sleeves and edging with blue stitching. If nothing else could be said of Sesshomaru, one did have to admit that he had an awesome sense of fashion. _'But nothing else of course, he's a cruel, cold bast-...'  
_  
Her inner thoughts were disrupted as she flung such insulting words from her mind. It might have been true, but she would not think of the demon who had taken care of her wound with such degrading words. _'He was the one who gave them to you!'_ Another shake of her head, feeling water droplets fly from her hairs end as she grabbed another towel and took down the task of drying herself off completely before she dressed herself. After six years in Sengoku Jidai, her body had grown into a womanly shape, and her undergarments from her time had long ago grown too small. She did only what she could, by wrapping her chest with an extra cloth so that she would not be hindered by their growth. Besides that, she had assimilated well within the dressing standards of the current time.  
  
Pulling her damp locks back into the low ponytail, she turned on her barefeet, leaving the towels folded on the bench, before she made her way back to her room. She would have to retrieve her boots, which she had found very comfortable and easy to move about in. Besides, the kimono was long enough to hide her boots if they offended Sesshomaru. Once in the security of her room, she took a look at her reflection from the long mirror, making final adjustments. _'Why do I care if my looks meet his standards? It isn't as if I care what he thinks of me. So why am I flustered?'_ She smoothed down the fabric with swift hands, tucking a stray lock of hair behind her ears._ 'It is because Lord Sesshomaru does not allow things that offend his senses to remain..'_ The voice was silenced as the neko servant was suddenly standing behind her, green eyes smiling.  
  
"You look fine enough Kagome, please... Lord Sesshomaru is awaiting your arrival at the dining area."  
  
Kagome did not speak, nor return the smile that she saw start to bloom on the youkai's face. Instead, she turned and followed the woman through the dark corridors. While the silent miko did not seem as if she was paying close attention to the twists and turns that were made, she used peripheral vision to use landmarks in her mind to remember her way to and from any meal-time. Soon, after what seemed forever of trudging through the halls, she spotted Lord Sesshomaru standing in front of open double doors, on the other side was a long table, that Kagome had no doubt seated over twenty bodies. The demon servant left just as soon.  
  
Kagome looked over to the taiyoukai, hiding behind her mask the appreciative eye that she gave him from under her longer bangs. He was rather dashing, having changed out of the pure white outfit, to one that had red and blue trimmings in the same places as hers. His beauty wasn't ruined by the absence of his left arm, if at all it could have magnified it. She gave a deep bow to her host. _'Beauty is too simple of a word. He is divine...'_ She could almost hear her inner voice sigh . _'Useless! Attraction and physcial beauty are useless.'_ A mental hand came out and smacked the other voice out of anger. _'Still... it cannot be avoided.'  
_  
"Lord Sesshomaru, I thank you for allowing this miko to eat of your food..."  
  
She did catch the surprise on his face, and felt just as surprised as he did. _'This miko? Where had that come from?'_ He seemed to pay it no more mind, his attention brought back to her respectable state of dress and attitude. She truly had changed, and he could not deem it as a bad one at all. He gave a tilt of his head, to acknowledge that she was there, before leading the way into the eating area. He watched with careful eyes, as she did not seat herself at the table, before he had done so.  
  
"So miko, tell me. Have you found a way to return my arm to me?"  
  
This brought Kagome's gaze up to meet his own across the table.  
  
"Hai, I have. I have only maybe a day to prepare the necessary precautions, than you may ask of my service whenever you see fit to have your arm returned to you Lord Sesshomaru."  
  
The meal itself was spent in silence, though each occupant had many things on their minds.  
  
----------  
  
Authors Note:  
  
**Shabopo**: Peut-être notre petit miko a eu le respect pour notre taiyoukai du Ne commençant ? Elle couvre ses sentiments comme Sesshomaru parce que c'est la seule manière qu'elle peut survivre à l'heure actuelle. Si les émotions sont trop accabler, juste écrasez-les en bas du non ? Merci de la revue et des mots aimables.  
  
**ShadowPhoenix1**: I'd like to see how their -not- going to kill each other before the next chapter is up! I'm not too worried about her repaying her debt.  
****

**ScreaminChild**: I hope I do not disappoint. I couldn't think of anything else to serve as payment. Sesshomaru still holds revulsion towards humans, so that seemed the only possible choice in my mind.  
  
I am sorry if this chapter is rather dull and not filled with much action. But I promise this next one shall be, since it will be when Kagome tries to return his arm to him. Maybe some fighting going on. We will have to see. Enjoy this chapter as much as you can... again sorry for it's boring tone. Set-up for Kagome I suppose.


	7. Secrets kept, lost concentration

_"[her] reflection of the soul  
deep down in my heart  
filling a hole  
created by hate  
the fact - the fact that I'm alone  
her face has turned to stone  
Feel the rhythm, feel the soul."_

_-Lords of Acid 'Take Control'-_

  
Sesshomaru could not fully admit that he enjoyed this change in Kagome, couldn't even consider it totally truthful. Yes, her bubbly and emotional outlook had rubbed him raw in many ways all those years ago, but yet, he seemed to miss it. It had been who she was, and all those smiles she gave, was what made her shine the most. True that she was a calm and educated young woman now, he knew that keeping all of one's emotions hidden was not healthy. This collected and silent miko in front of him, gave him reasons to mentally fidget. He was used to being the controlled one, to being the one who could read everyone's emotions, and yet her strangely beautiful face remained a mask in front of him.  
  
_'This will not do at all.. Oh, what are you saying, of course it will do! Her petty emotions no longer taint her scent..'_  
  
"Feh..."  
  
He waved a hand in front of his face, earning a strange glance from Kagome, who had been content to eat her rice in silence. He returned the look, though his could be considered a glare. To replace his dignity, and to not look an absolute fool, he growled.  
  
"A day is not satisfactory. You shall be ready by tomorrow morning. This Sesshomaru does not wait for a ningen's need to prepare. You will be ready, and that is the simple fact."  
  
He leaned away from the low table, trying to look menacing at best. His usual motion of crossing his arms over his chest of course could not be taken into consideration. Turning his head to the side, as if he was dismissing her, he waited for some sort of angry reaction from the woman seated across from him, finally the silence was too much, and he turned just to see if she was still in the room.  
  
Sure enough, the miko was still present, continueing to eat softly from the white bowl in front of her. It seemed that not even anger could break through as easily as it had years ago.  
  
"Have you not even the respect to listen to me when I speak in your direction? I sai-"  
  
"I know what you said Lord Sesshomaru. If you wish for me to attempt it as early as tomorrow, than I shall. It would be unwise to rush such things but...."  
  
His slender eyebrow rose up, and if Kagome knew no better, she would assume that this had angered the great Sesshomaru. She remained impassive as she continued to eat the rice in front of her.  
  
"You would say that this Sesshomaru is unwise? That is a mistake miko, one that you will pay for dearly."  
  
He heard her chopsticks being set down on the table lightly, as she brushed her hands on the napkin that sat in her lap. She took a few moments to completely chew what was left in her mouth before she cleared her throat. Her blue gaze seemed ignited with what he could only call irritation. _'How dare she be irritated at this Sesshomaru! I am not some child, I am a demon that should be feared!'_  
  
"Lord Sesshomaru, this miko is saying nothing of the like. I just wish to press the fact that in order to restore your arm to your being, I must use my miko powers, and if I am not fully prepared, something could happen to jeopardize your health. This miko meant no respect in her words."  
  
Now, his jaw was loose from it's position and sagging open at such open shock. Was this woman not angered by his words? Could she not break her mask enough just for one small emotion to slip through? It was truly unnerving to see her so stoic with everything she said and did. _'Kagome, what has happened to you?'_  
  
"I care not, you will be prepared by the next sunrise. I have waited many years for my arm to be restored, I will wait no longer. If something does happen in error, I trust you understand that it will be taken out on you."  
  
His head was tilted down, as if he would give his table more attention than the miko, but he could not help to stare out through his pale lashes at the miko before him. Her only reaction to his further words, was to stand from her position and walk towards the doors. _'She is leaving without permission, you must stop her and reprimand her in the upmost manner. She must learn her position!'  
_  
Sesshomaru did not ignore this voice, but instead slammed his hand on the table as he jerked to his feet. Dashing towards the door, he slammed it back shut with a loud growl reverberating through the halls.  
  
"I have not given you permission to leave miko, you presume to much relaxiation when you are in my home. I command respect, and leaving without my word is a direct insult to my being."  
  
Instead of her cheeks flushing with indignation, instead of screaming her head off, she just slowly rotated till she met his gaze, having to tilt her head back lightly, but not as much as she had too years ago.  
  
"Gomen Lord Sesshomaru, but I must prepare myself if you really wish to be healed of your current state tomorrow."  
  
With that she turned back towards the door and left, since his hold on the door had slackened with her words. What was it with him? Had he truly weakened that much since Rin had come and gone from his life? He noticed his reactions were unfair, and rather arrogant, he noticed how she held nothing but respect from her end, and yet he continued to disrespect her. Why did he feel the need to respect her, and yet deny her of it? Because she was a human miko and he was supposed to hate her kind?  
  
With a sigh, he slapped his palm against the door and growled in anger before he swung himself out of the dining area and stalked down the corridors, making his way to his private chambers.  
  
----------  
  
_"What was that move that they taught in self-defense, where you block the killer's knife? Move with some confidence,  
the signal when you're trapped inside a moving car,  
I wonder if he'll drive real far. What a day, you should've stayed home shootin' the breeze all day, you should think next time before you start to play, I wonder what will happen today."  
  
-Nonpoint 'What a Day'-_  
  
Kagome's night had not gone well, she had spent most of it in deep meditation, to ready her body and mind for the task that she had ahead of herself. Not even a fully-trained miko would be able to do something as returning a demon's arm without problems among the way. Her biggest one, was to find a way to protect Sesshomaru while she worked, and yet leave enough opening so that her miko powers could set to work. While she found Sesshomaru to be oddly irritating at times, she did not wish for his life to be terminated early for her mistakes, or even hurt for that matter.  
  
Even more so, she did not wish to give him a reason to particularly hate her at the moment, she was human, that was bad enough. Lord forbid if she was a human that had hurt him from her mistakes.  
  
Getting only a few hours of peaceful sleep, she would have to take extra care she was precise with her every move during the "procedure". She bathed quickly, clothing herself with a kimono of harsher fabric, one that was meant to be worn during travel and more things besides pleasing one's host. She kept her hair flowing though, a difference from her appearance earlier. The servant from the previous day was waiting outside of her doors when she walked through, her feet once again covered with her boots.  
  
"Lord Sesshomaru awaits you in his office."  
  
Instead of being lead there by the servant, she left after her message was relayed, though it did not bother the miko much. She knew her way quite well around Sesshomaru's abode by now, using his scent as a guide. She would not tell him of this new developement, but instead kept it her own secret. She had many things that she kept from her host. Calmly making her way to his office, she did not even have to knock upon the large door, before she heard his smooth voice call to her from his desk no doubt.  
  
She walked in without a seconds passing, standing quietly in front of his desk.  
  
"I hope you are ready. I require that you do this quickly, I have many things to do today."  
  
With a bow of her dark head, feeling a few strands fall over her shoulder and brush across her cheek, she did not dare restrain it at the moment. She looked towards the taiyoukai, as if expecting him to move from his position at the desk, when he did not, she tapped her foot on the floor before she crossed her arms over her chest, her voice remaining the same.  
  
"Lord Sesshomaru, I would reccommend that we do this outside in one of the gardens. I have taken as many precautions as I can, but still, in case something does go wrong then I would not wish to destroy your study or any part of your home."  
  
Surprisingly, the demon stood up then, and walked out of the study, expecting her to follow close behind him as he walked from his home and into the lesser gardens, with little to no significance. Already there was a blanket laid out on the grass, with a pillow, no doubt for the demon to place his head upon so that he might relax. Kagome was the first to kneel upon the fabric, letting her legs fold under her weight.  
  
"If you would, please lay upon the blanket so that you may be as comfortable as possible while I do this. It will hurt by nature, no need to be in any discomfort more than you have to be."  
  
She watched as he stared at the blanket as if it might bite him should he lay upon it, but with a stern glare from the miko, he seated himself, before letting his upper body fall upon the ground. He looked towards the miko, who was kneeling tightly against his left side. She placed her right hand upon his chest, almost jumping back when he snatched at her hand and almost flung it from his person.  
  
"Lord Sesshomaru! I am not going to hurt you, i only wish to place a ward of protection on your being, just in case my powers rage out of control. Trust me when I say that this miko would never intentionally harm you."  
  
Their gazes locked over the air between them, golden orbs staring deep into the dark blue orbs. He didn't know how to explain it, but he did trust her, it had just been instinct to snatch at the human that dared touch him. He was surprised that she had taken both his health, and the state of his home into consideration when she prepared for this. He gave a final nod of his head, to signal that he was ready for her to begin.  
  
They both watched as a lavender glow flowed from out of her hand and surronded his entire form, though it didn't seem to reach to his stump, was it because she did not want her protection ward to throw off the power she would use to restore his arm? He waited, till he looked towards the morning sky. He was aware of all that was going on, but he could feel his senses dull slightly. _'She is trying to blind-side you! She's going to kill you, or run from her duties!'_ He lazily slsapped at the voice._ 'Nonsense, she is just trying to keep me from feeling the brunt of the force.'_ Wait, why was he defending this miko from his youkai voice?  
  
He turned his eyes to watch as she finally cupped both of her hands around the end of his stump, her eyes closing as she focused on the power within her, so that she could manipulate it. She was rather prett like that, with her loose dark hair flowing behind her, her face calm and smooth in her concentration. Her scent was just as calming, making Sesshomaru's eyes close as he let her administer to him as she saw fit.  
  
Kagome, all the while, was forcing her power to calm under her stroking hand. Sometimes she thought it did have a mind of it's own, and it didn't seem to enjoy the idea of helping a demon, not one bit. She was glad that she had placed that protective ward around Sesshomaru, for now it seemed that it wouldn't be such an easy task. Slowly, but surely it started to calm as she mentally caressed it now, molding it in mental hands as she softly pushed it towards the stump that was being held by her physical hands. In her memories, she brought to mind the exact vision of what it would look like. The muscular tone, the length, the skin hue. Down to the very youkai marks near his wrist. The long claws, it all had to be perfect. And slowly, like she was a seamstress, she worked her hands down the air in front of the stump, starting to feel warm skin below as his arm started to take shape.  
  
She could feel that his heart was still beating in a regular repetition. All his vitals seemed to be normal, and his thoughts were not that worried, though what she heard in his mind was slightly confusing...  
  
_'She is not so bad for a human. She can keep her emotions under control now, but I wish she would smile, at least once, I feel at a lose.... SHUT UP!! Stop whimpering over the miko. She's a human, should be destroyed... But how could I destroy such a beauty...'_  
  
She reeled back from his thoughts, but did not lose her concentration as her powers continued to work down his arm. Now his fingers were in her hands and she only had the claws to finish. Neither Sesshomaru or her sensed the quick arrival of Jaken, the annoying toad. He assumed the worst of course that the miko was trying to kill his master. With an agility that Kagome would have thought the toad was bereft of, he swung his two headed staff and let it connect against the back of cranium before she could react. Her concentration slipped, just as the left arm was completely finished. With her mind suddenly surronded by two youkai, her power lashed out, no longer under her control. She tried to mentally hug it wth her arms, and swallow it back into her body, but it's effects had already been acheived. Jaken had been thrown across the garden, slamming against a tree.  
  
With a gasp she looked down to Sesshomaru. He was still breathing, his body was still intact, but he wasn't waking up from his semi-sleep like she had thought. She grabbed at his shoulders, shaking them harshly as she tried to awaken the taiyoukai.  
  
"SESSHOMARU!!"  
  
Something had gone wrong, those few seconds where her power had been out of control, her protection ward must have slipped. 'This can't be happening, this can't be happening.' She pulled her hand back and slapped her palm against his cheek, hoping that the disrespectful reaction would awaken him, but when it did not work, her breathing turned ragged. For a second, the old Kagome came back full-force. Her face was contorted in frustration and anger towards herself for letting her concentration slip.  
  
Finally she decided what it was that she would have to do. With a sigh, something seemed to change about the woman as she stood, pulling at the youkai's arms till he was dragging on the ground, pulling one of his arms across her shoulders, her other arm around his waist, as she limped from his weight into his home. Once inside she was screaming for anyone to help her, just her luck the neko youkai was the first to reply. The woman got under his otherside and helped Kagome drag him to his private chambers, where he was laid on the bed. Once he was down, Kagome was sitting on the bed, pushing away the female demon with a determination.  
  
"Leave us, do not let anyone disturb me. If my concentration is broken once again, it could very well kill your master this time.... Thank you for your help though."  
  
As the woman exited, Kagome looked down to Sesshomaru. He looked so peaceful, it was hard to believe that something was gravely wrong with him. Why was he not waking up?  
  
----------  
  
Authors Note: I am well aware that a human would not be able to begin to support a demon such as Sesshomaru. There is a secret that Kagome is hiding, and I'm sure some of you might be able to guess what it is.  
  
Confusion of course.  
  
The Shikon No Tama is in Kagome..... but was it wished upon?


	8. Fingers and Tails

_"Could you could you come back  
Come back together  
Put yourself on my back  
And say it is forever."_

_-Coldplay 'One I Love'-_  
  
Sesshomaru had barely felt the pain of Kagome's miko powers washing over his left side. Her protection ward had been weaved so well, he almost felt as if he could fall asleep. Even in this semi-sleep that he was in, he could start to feel his arm being restored to his shoulder, feeling the skin and bones growing from under the miko's hands. It was a strange sensation, but a curious one to be sure.  
  
Fingers! He could move his fingers, he could feel his muscles twitch under his command. It was a wonderful sensation. Close to opening his eyes and staring at the woman in wonder, he felt a sharp pain to the back of his head, Jaken's presence suddenly offending him. He had only a few seconds to look towards the Miko, who's face was contorted with anger as she tried to keep her power under control, before he felt the explosion.  
  
All had gone dark, and he no longer seemed to care about his arm. He wasn't dreaming, but neither was he awake, somewhere inbetween, content to float where he was. He couldn't even feel his body being moved, he couldn't hear the miko scream for help. Standing? Was that what he was doing? He looked around with golden eyes, looking down to the land below his feet and the cloud below him. Where was he going? Before his thoughts could be answered, he felt something tug at his left hand. Looking down he saw the human girl, Rin. Was she not dead?  
  
_"Rin missed Sesshomaru-sama. Why did it take you so long?"  
  
What did she mean, he has always been here? Something was nagging at the back of his mind. Something that he was forgetting. But what could it have been? The girl tugged once again at his arm, and it was then that he noticed he shouldn't have had his arm. 'I lost it to a fight with Inu-yasha... so why do I have it?'  
  
"Rin wonders what Fluffy is thinking of. Is Fluffy not happy to see Rin again?"  
  
He picked the girl up in both of his arms, looking into her doe-brown eyes. Her body was warm, but not as warm as it should have been, just a degree of what it normally was. Her skin wasn't as tanned with youth as it had been. Her scent was different as well, what was it that was wrong?  
  
"Yes Rin, this Sesshomaru is happy to see Rin."  
  
She threw her small arms around his neck, pressing her giggling face against his shoulder, like she had done so many times before. This was right, it must have been. Rin was here, he had both his arms, so why did he still get the nagging sensation that it wasn't alright. His ears twitched from sounds on the distance. Sounds of his name being screamed. He wished to clap his ears from hearing such things, but he didn't wish to let go of Rin.  
  
'SESSHOMARU!! WAKE UP!!!'  
  
A sensastion pulled at his body as he flew, making him grab tighter to Rin. He had to protect her from whatever it was that was pulling at him. He had to fight those hands that were trying to wrap around him and pull him away from Rin. He could smell the salty tears that had started to pour down the girl's cheeks.  
  
"Rin does not want Sesshomaru-sama to leave. Rin was lonely all by herself..."  
  
He wanted to tell her he wasn't going to leave her agian. (Again?) That he was always there beside her. But before he could, she silenced him by placing her small, grubby hands against his lips.  
  
"But Fluffy does not belong here just yet. Fluffy still has many many many years to live, and it would be unfair of Rin to take Fluffy away now."  
  
In panic, Sesshomaru grabbed the girl tighter. He would not be left behind again, he wouldn't let Rin die. Yes, now he knew. Rin had died, and somehow the miko's powers went out of control. He wasn't dead, not just yet, but if he followed Rin, he could stay with her forever. That was what he wanted, and yet the thought of leaving the miko alone hurt just as bad. 'She has her friends to return to... don't think of her.' But if she really did, then why wasn't she with them now? With a voice of wisdom that Sesshomaru had never heard from the girl, and a face just as calm and mature, she spoke once again to him.  
  
"The Miko needs you. You are all that she has left in her world, she will die if you cannot break the seal over her person.... Besides Rin will wait for both you and the miko to join her once again."  
  
A giggle escaped the girls lips as Sesshomaru suddenly found himself pulled away from the girl as she seemed to stand on the sky, waving energetically at his retreating form._ He felt breathless, numb and cold all at the same time as he was suddenly slammed back into his body. Jerking up in the bed that he was laying on, he jerked his gaze over to the miko, who had passed out on the side of his bed from all her motions.  
  
He refused the feeling of sleep once again as he stood up, placing both of his hands on her shoulders and shaking her from whatever darkness there was. It was then that he noticed he had used both hands. Looking to his left, he inspected the arm that was once again there. He had expected it to look different, to feel different, something to be wrong, but it was just as it had been. She had restored it completely down to the stripes near his wrist, and the claws that pulled away from his fingertips.  
  
Returning his attention back to Kagome, he shook her once again. He watched as her eyes started to flutter open. Their hue was of a lighter blue, as if she had been drained of her life when she had pulled him from death. Her lips were dry and her skin had paled significantly.  
  
"This Sesshomaru wants to know what has sealed you..... I need to know what has happened to you and your group."  
  
He wanted to add more to his statement, but he could think of nothing else. It was the truth, he needed to know. Her presence and her past was confusing him, and it complicated his emotions. He knelt down in front of her, his hands on her knee's as he stared at her, waiting for her answer.  
  
"I wished upon the Shikon No Tama."  
  
----------  
  
_"I'll paint it on the walls  
Cuz I'm the one that falls  
I'll never fight again  
And this is how it ends."_

_-Linkin Park 'Breaking the Habit'-_  
  
She sat in front of him now, they had once again made their way to the garden. She felt more comfortable explaining all that had happened to Sesshomaru if they were in the open air, surronded by the trees and the flowers. Placing her person back down onto the blanket that she had laid out for Sesshomaru, she did not wait to see if he was listening, before she started to speak.  
  
"The final battle with Naraku was harder than we had all expected. No matter how hard we fought, it always seemed that he deflected it, and hurt us ten times worse. At first we thought we were all done for, that we would die then and there. How we won, I cannot even believe it now. It was the worst day of my life. If you had not known before, Miroku the monk had the wind tunnel, a curse that Naraku had placed on the males of his family. If he did not defeat Naraku swiftly, the hole would eventually suck him up as well, destroying Miroku. We had never noticed it, but Miroku did. The wind tunnel was starting to enlargen right there as we fought."  
  
She took a deep breathe, trying to keep her memories from flashing back to the look of horror on Miroku and Sango's face as the hole started to widen. To think that they had harbored emotions for each other the whole time, and never had the chance to profess them. She breathed in around her tears, trying to keep them at bay.  
  
"We came up with a last ditch effort to defeat Naraku. Miroku would suck him into the wind tunnel, along with his poison swarm, but we had to retreive the last of the Shikon so that it would not be sucked in with him. A made a protective shield around Naraku, that was made to protect the jewel, and not him. Inu-yasha hated what I would have to do, but it had to be done. I cut a hole in my side, and pushed our shards into my side. It was the only way that Naraku would completely merge with me. I remember letting one of his tentacles slide around my waist and pull me up to him. It was horrific, to let the blackness of the demons eat at my flesh as he consumed me. I was still alive, still somewhat whole. I let him take me in till the other half of the Shikon No Tama was in front of me. Not caring of the pain, I reached out with my hands and captured in, pulling it back into my body with the other half."  
  
She had by then dipped her head down, to hide from the pain she had felt. Had that been the pain that every demon which was obsurbed by Naraku felt? She brushed at her eyes, afraid she had let a few tears slip, but her cheeks had remained dry. She shuddered visibly now as she took in another breathe and continued.  
  
"A sent a final flash of my power out from my form, to warn Inu-yasha that the jewel was once again complete. He pulled the Tetseiga and slashed through Naraku. It weakened the demon enough for my body to fall forth, with the Shikon No Tama in my side. Miroku said his final words to the group, and while Naraku thrashed about, trying to capture me once again, he sucked the demon and the swarm into his hand, just as the tunnel took him as well. I had little strength to throw a protection shield around the rest of us, so that we would not suffer that fate. Naraku was gone, and so was the beloved monk. Sango, Inu-yasha, and myself were the only one's left. We had traveled back to Kaede's village, but Sango was never the same. She had loved Miroku, and now she had no one. Her village had been destroyed, her family had been destroyed, and now Miroku was gone. She wanted to join them in death, she felt no need in staying. She told me one night that with the Shikon No Tama complete, we no longer needed to stay. I would be leaving soon to go back to my own time and never come back, Inu-yasha would be a full demon. we were not needed. That night, Kohaku's spirit visited us at the hut, and lead his sister into the woods, where she would join her family. Our group of five was suddenly down to two. Inu-yasha and myself."  
  
The one person of the group that she had not yet spoken of had been Shippou, but she dared not say his name without breaking down into tears. Inu-yasha she could at least speak of and not be in total pain. She had accepted his decision and would no longer be plagued by it.  
  
"Before I left for my time, Inu-yasha confronted me in the forest, Kikyou was behind him. I knew what it was he was going to tell me. He had decided. He wanted to go to hell with Kikyou. We exchanged words, and I finally slayed him with an arrow, as I would not let him be dragged down by Kikyou. I was left alone, and with Shikon No Tama still in my side. I had gone back to my time, but as I looked towards my house, and my family that was in it, I no longer felt as if I belonged there. My heart and soul had been in this era for so long that I felt a stranger in my own home. I couldn't stay there, I couldn't stand to bear all the friends that I had lost. I left a note for my mother, explaining to her why I had to stay in the past. I destroyed the well when I returned and wished upon the Shikon No Tama."  
  
As she spoke, something shimmered around her, her human features disappearing. Her ears were slightly pointed, and her usually raven hair had streaks of snow white hair. One eye had remained the dark blue from before, but her right eye was blazing out with a golden-green hue. Two blue stripes adorned her cheeks, and a black star had been etched on her forehead. Sesshomaru watched as a black tail peeked over her shoulder, waving lazily in the air. Her scent was of rosemary and.... starlight?  
  
"I wished for it to take away my pain, my weakness, so that I wouldn't feel it anymore. I knew that I should word it specifically, or it would take effect years from now. So I only said my immediate pain. My humanness was my weakness. So it turned me youkai. But I feel this emptiness inside, I am not complete and I do not know what it is. Have you ever had the feeling that your soul is missing it's parts. I can't explain it, but I feel as if I'm just a shell of what I used to be..."  
  
----------  
  
Authors Note:  
  
Close, she didn't wish specifically to be demon, she just wished her pain and weakness to be taken away. So the Shikon made her a demon. I know this has been used many times before.... but oh well I suppose.  
  
I'm sure there is still a little bit of confusion over the Shikon No Tama. Like why is it still there if it has been wished on? I haven't talked about it completely yet, because I haven't worked out all the details of the story.  
  
Forgive me.


	9. Sesshomaru hatching from a cold coccoon

_"Just a castaway  
An island lost at sea  
Another lonely day  
With no one here but me  
More loneliness  
Than any man could bear  
Rescue me before I fall into despair."_

_-Sting 'Message In A Bottle'-_  
  
Once she had finished her story, Sesshomaru had mercifully let her retire to her room for much needed sleep. She didn't both to place her human facade back up, and instead walked proudly to her room as a youkai. Once she was in the safety of the four walls, she collapsed onto the bed. Her shoulders shook and she sounded as if she sobbed, but no tears poured from her eyes. Of all her lost friends, she had grieved over Shippou the most, her small surrogate son. He had died during the battle with Naraku. Kagome hadn't paid enough attention, and she was close to being fatally wounded. Little Shippou had charged in front of her, and had let the spiked tentacle slice through his chest. That was the point that had given Kagome the determination to be obsurbed by Naraku. She could still remember the deadly silence that had filled the air as Shippou's little body hit the ground beside her. His eyes were open in shock, but his face had been calm. He had sacrificed his life, so that his mother would survive. She could remember how even the large demon Naraku had stopped his movements, all eyes had fallen onto the miko as she leaned down and had picked up the small body.  
  
Her tears then had been hot and heavy, running down her face like a river. She blamed his death on her of course, because if she had been as attentive as she should be, she would have seen the attack, and would have been able to move. She wouldn't even be able to save him, and she dared not wish upon the Shikon No Tama, wondering upon what horrors would be brought back. In the bed that she was now laying, she curled her arms in front of her, as if she was holding the small kitsune, cooing under her breathe. It hurt, to know that he was gone, it hurt even worse to know that she could have saved him, if only she hadn't been so weak.  
  
Curling her black tail about her form, the fur thick and almost fuzzy, hiding much of her body. She sobbed herself into a sleep that was plagued by the day of the battle, making the miko youkai toss about in her bed, unknowingly revealing her pain to the taiyoukai that stood in her door frame.  
  
----------  
_"I wake up  
Thoughts of you  
Tattooed to my mind  
As I wonder  
What to wear  
What to eat  
Who to be  
Will I see you again."_

_-Maroon 5 'If You Only Knew'_-  
  
Sesshomaru had been surprised, angered, saddened... too many emotions to count as he listened to the miko speak her tale. But he always listened with direct eyes, showing her that he was listening to her intently. Of course in the back of his mind, he continued to question himself, trying to guess what it had been that the miko wished for. His face contorted from one emotion to the other as he listened to each of her friends deaths, whether they be painful or swift.  
  
No wonder she had changed so much. To lose all that you had known within such a short amount of time, he was surprised she had not died from the heavy weight of despair on her heart. Could human hearts really sustain that much pain and live properly? Her physical change had not taken his attention for a few seconds, as he had been listening to her words with such a depth, he seemed to stare out into space. He did not actually look at her, till her scent reached his nose.  
  
Jerking his eyes up, and almost gasping from the sight before him. A miko youkai? He took in the delicately pointed ears, the two-toned eye color. Taking in the facial markings and watching as the white streaks slide down her locks. Watching the black tail wave softly from behind her, he had the most obsurd urge to pet it, but he squashed it down with a mentally fist. _'This Sesshomaru does not pet things.'_ Looking down to her hands, which were in her lap, he almost laughed at the small claws that had sprouted from the tips of her fingernails. They looked so small and delicate, like a childs, but he knew they could be deadly.  
  
After her rendering of the tale was finished, he was quite able to tell that she was ragged, her shoulders shaking from having to remember and retell it all. Sesshomaru could be ruthless, but to see the powerful miko youkai shaking from her words was enough to crack his cold exterior. Without answering her question of feeling incomplete and such things, he told her to return to her room for some rest. She had nodded her gratitude and had stood to her feet with a fluid grace that he saw in her human form.  
  
He tried to keep his eyes averted from her form as she walked back towards his home, but he could not help to let his eyes wander. Not only were her words affecting him greatly, but the words of his human girl Rin were making him think oddly. She had told him that he was to stay with the miko, because if he did not break this seal on her, she would die. So what exactly was being sealed, and how? Was it her soul, was that why she felt incomplete? He outwardly growled at the thought of her life being endangered, but this motion caused him further anger. _'Why should I care if her life is in danger?'_ The vision of Rin came to his mind unbidden.  
  
_'The Miko needs you. You are all that she has left in her world, she will die if you cannot break the seal over her person....'_  
  
Putting his chin in his hand, his newly formed hand, he gave another deep growl. He couldn't help but feel pulled towards the miko, whether by the fates or his own decision he could not decide, but at the same time he did not wish to let such a woman close to him. True, she was a youkai now, but she had been human at some point..._'Feh, you know that's not the reason at all. Your just afraid.'_ A golden glare scent to his demon side before he reprimanded himself. _'No I'm not, I just wish not to affiliate with a used-to-be-human-turned-youkai female. Besides, I have better things to do with my time.'_ A snicker could be heard in the back of his head before the demon nipped at the edges of his thoughts. _'You're just as lonely as she is. What could it hurt?'  
_  
"It could hurt a lot."  
  
He had let Rin close to his heart, come to love her, and she had died. That had hurt. Everytime she was injured in life, or her life was threatened, it had angered him and made him sick with worry. That hurt. So what if he did the same with this new miko? He would let her into his life, and somewhere down the road she would grow on him. He wasn't just stating the truth, he was stating the obvious. It was bound to happen.  
  
"Feh..petty emotions."  
  
He stood to his feet quickly, stalking into his home with a deadly speed. He would retreat to his chambers and sleep all this off. He would forget it all by the next day, and ask the miko to leave. Yes, that is what he would do. He could do it too! Because he was Lord Sesshomaru, Taiyoukia of the Western Lands. His resolved faltered when he passed by Kagome's room, and he heard sobs break from the walls. Pressing his body against the door, sniffing her scent quickly. He could sense her sadness but he did not smell her tears. He waited till her breathing was calm and he knew her to be completely asleep before he opened the door.  
  
She was curled up on her bed, not having disrobed from her clothes or boots. Her tail was wrapped about her person, till she looked nothing more than a black fur ball on the bed. A frown contorted his features as he continued to gaze upon the sleeping woman. Her question from earlier flared on the inside of his mind.  
  
_'Have you ever had the feeling that your soul is missing it's parts?'_  
  
He tilted his head down, shutting his eyes harshly against how she hit home with that question, and how it made all of these forgotten emotions to bubble forth in his own person.  
  
"Yes, I have that feeling everyday that I breathe."  
  
He whispered into the air. He didn't know if he was speaking to himself or to the sleeping miko. His gaze was darkened by his memories as he exited her room and slipped into his own chambers.  
  
----------  
  
_"And what have I learned  
From all this pain  
I thought I'd never feel the same  
About anyone or anything again  
But now I know."_

_-George Michael 'Jesus to a Child'-_  
  
The night hadn't been soft on either of it's inhabitants. Each sleep had been filled of unwanted memories and emotions surging forth without permission from the owners. Sesshomaru had awoken in a rather irritated mood, while Kagome had just....awakened, and nothing more. Bathing and dressing himself quickly, he made his way down to the dining area. While he did not need much food to survive, today was one where he could feel his own stomach protesting it's emptiness.  
  
He would be lying if he said that he expected the miko to be waiting there for him. He had assumed she would still be sleeping, or would at least stay to herself for the day, especially after all that had happened the day before. But there she was, standing as a youkai and not a human, her hands clasped in front of her, her form dressed in a midnight-blue kimono with white stars accenting the fabric. Her long streaked hair was pulled back into a low ponytail once again, and she kept her eyes towards the floor. Even after all that she had revealed to him, she still acted the same.  
  
_'She's beautiful and you know it. Not just as a youkai, but as a mature human, she still had her qualities.'  
_  
Without a second thought, or a growl to accent his anger at his inner thoughts, he made his way to the table and kneeled in front of it. He watched from the corner of his eye as Kagome finally moved, and seated herself across from him, her head still down, her hands tucked nicely in her lap. It didn't take long till the servants came out with rice and fruit for the morning meal. Both of them only drank water, and sat in silence as they ate.  
  
This went about for minutes upon more awkward minutes. He would have thought that after she told him all of her story, she would be more conversational, but once again the miko in front of him had done the opposite of what he had first concluded. He set his chopsticks down, and looked at her blatantly now. He would eye her until she reacted. Another few moments went by, before Kagome did the same as he had done. Pulling her two-toned gaze up to meet his.  
  
"Have I done something to offend you Lord Sesshomaru? You look as if you are mad with me."  
  
If he had a tail as she did, no doubt it would be flipping around in the air by now in irritation.  
  
"I'm not mad, I just do not enjoy this silence that has befallen us. I wish for you to speak with me as if I am an aquaintance. I do not bite unless provoked. You should know that by now Kagome."  
  
He finally saw her face move as she seemed shocked that he had used her first name. Softly, he saw her tail twitch as she thought of to proceed with her next words.  
  
"I am sorry Lord Sesshomaru, I will do better to speak with you, instead of remaining silenced in your company."  
  
He wanted to growl and command her to drop the formalities. If it had been anyone else, he would have expected it, but coming from the Kagome that he knew as fiesty and bold, it seemed strange. And why was he suddenly so lenient and talkative with her.  
  
"Feh, just stop being a mask. Oh, and you shall be remaining here for an amount of time that I see fit. I will not have you go back out on your own without being properly trained of your powers and your new body. Do not argue with me, for this Sesshomaru will not tolerate it."  
  
He tried to tell himself he kept her around for that very reason, and not because he wished to see her smile, and not because he found himself calmed when she was with him. He didn't tell her to stay because he wished to know her better, and not because he thought her too beautiful to forget just yet. He didn't let her stay because he felt a connection with her, and not because he had hope that she was to be the one to show him love.  
  
It was a futile effort when he looked back to Kagome, and her eyes were alight with something that he could not name, but found rather appealing. He could not help it when he felt his lips twitch into the smallest of smiles, before standing up, and extending his restored arm out for her to grasp his hand.  
  
"Please, follow me."  
  
_'Since when did this Sesshomaru say please?'_ A mental growl that turned into obsurd laughter. _'Oh, be quiet!'_  
  
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Authors Note:  
  
**inukagonly**: Confused? Well ask me to clarify and I shall.  
  
**xXSyaoranLuverPinayXx**: Thank you, but I hope with more chapters, I can get more details in. I don't wish to bore everyone with details, but I find the story lacking in that area from time to time.  
  
**kojika85**: blush Why thank you very much. I am very glad that you find it so interesting and worth the time to read. More reviews would be great, but I am glad for the one's that I get, no need to be greedy.  
  
**ScreaminChild**: Yes, you were half-right. But we'll count it as a full out right!


	10. Nudity, Clothing, and Puppy Dogs

Naraku, the dark hanyou, the destroyer of hundreds, manipulator, evil incarnate. He had been an extremely tough opponent to beat in the end. Thousands of reincarnations spread among the land by the wind. Not just that, but he had many puppets to delay the battle being brought to him. Some called him cowardly, others called him strategic. Whatever it was that Naraku was labelled, he was a harsh enemy. He was ruthless, and did not suffer from mercy. It was doubtful that he had any emotions besides the ever constant need to be the most powerful, to control all that he wanted. He had determination and enough power to accomplish his task, his only weakness... he underestimated his opponents. He failed to acknowledge the power that each individual possessed. His mistake, and his untimely downfall.  
  
It would be a mistake that would never be repeated, and instead used to learn from. Naraku's downfall was a handy lesson to all sorts of creatures what should and shouldn't be done. Kikoroya knew this, and would hold it to the best of his advantage. He would win where the hanyou had failed, he would retrieve the Shikon No Tama, as he could still it vibe the air with it's power. He would watch his enemgy, etch her person and powers into his mind. She might be a youkai at the present date in time, but she was first and foremost, a miko, one that should never be messed with without preparation.  
  
True, the Shikon No Tama was his target, but it wouldn't hurt him to take Kagome down with it. Afterall, she had been rumored to have grown even more powerful, and how much of an incentive would it be to destroy the woman? He would be the talk of every person, including demons and humans. Her heart or her head would make a nice trophy, so that he could tell all that he was the mightly youkai that had bested the mysterious miko.  
  
The vision of Kagome slowly faded from sight as the rippling water reached it's peak. The demon stood to his full height. At the moment she was near-invinsible. She held her emotions in tight hands, and let none of her leftover weaknesses shine out. But he knew the longer she stayed with Sesshomaru, the more that taiyoukai could wiggle her out of her shell, the more weaknesses would be revealed. Sesshomaru might be able to bring the woman from her souls hiding place, and place her directly into Kikoroya's path.  
  
So maybe he was quite like Naraku in that sense. Maybe he did have a sadistic need to watch the two grow close to each other, only to tear them apart, and watch them suffer once again. It mattered not, he would be the one to succeed in the end.  
  
----------  
  
She watched Sesshomaru with guarded eyes, placing her smaller hand inside his grasp. For once she just stood there, half risen and still somewhat sitting. She compared his hands to hers, how strong and yet graceful they were. The claws that barely touched the back of her hand, the magenta stripes at his wrist. A hand that could crush her throat within the instant, and yet now it had the ability to softly help her to her feet. Bringing her eyes up to meet his own, she watched as his lips curled slightly at the corner. _'Sesshomaru is smiling?'_ She wished she could return the sight, but she didn't feel the motivation to do so, instead she just gave a delicate bow of her head before she relinquished his hand back to him.  
  
She had been shocked to say the least that he had asked, no demanded that she stay with him longer. She heard his reasoning behind such a command, and she knew that it could be a legitimate reasoning for the taiyoukai, so why did she feel relieved that she was to stay there? She was not scared of roaming the Feudal Era any longer, she had done so by herself for six years. Neither did she hate the path her life had taken.... it hadn't taken getting used to, but she didn't hate. No matter what she had been turned into, no matter what had happened six years ago, she could never really hate, even now, as a youkai she did not hate anyone.  
  
She followed his graceful form, and took this secret time to herself to truly look him over, and mentally comment if she so felt the need. True, she remembered him being much taller six years ago, much more intimidating, but she had grown in those years. He was still taller than she was, by a large margin, and he was still intimidating when he was in his moods, but she never reacted to it as she had in the past. His moon-white hair still remained the same, maybe it had grown in length, or maybe he had deigned to trim it slightly, Kagome had never been obsessed enough to measure the length. She had always known that it was longer than hers, but now she almost laughed at the idea, that hers was now longer. His physical build, while she could not see it, knew it be toned and firm. There was not an ounce of fat that was not meant to be there, every muscle had grown to the appeasement of Sesshomaru's physical demand. His skin was still creamy and smooth, with no scars whatsoever to mar his beauty, even now his skin was paler than hers, and while she was a youkai, her scars from her human years remained on her body. For that she was grateful, her scars were her own photoalbum of what she had done and acheived over her years. She may not receive new one's, but that fit her just fine. Her thoughts rested on his perfectly sculpted face, the finely chiseled bones of his cheekbones and his jawline. _'I wonder what it would be like to run my ton-'_ With a hidden blush, Kagome squashed down the voice that had started to accompany her thoughts ever since she became youkai. _'It's only my demon side, it's not what I'm actually wondering about.'_ She crossed her arms in front of her chest, her hands pulled into the opposing kimono sleeves as she walked.  
  
She tried not to jerk from her thoughts, both joyful and indignate when Sesshomaru turned around to look at her. She could tell from his face that he was confused by her at the moment. Had she let her control slip while she was thinking upon him, and he could sense her mental change from her scent? She shrugged her shoulders, taking the time to pull her hand back and scratch at her neck, a very human reaction that she would never shed. In order to break the silence that was placed upon them, she tried at conversation.  
  
"Where is it that we are going Lord Sesshomaru?"  
  
He did not stop his steps as he answered her question, a fact that had her mentally reeling. _'Since when did that Sesshomaru answer questions, especially so easily?'  
_  
"Since you are to be staying here for awhile, you must aquire new rooms. The rooms you have frequented lately are for human servants, which I have no need of. But since you are miko youkai in training, it is by standards that you receive a better room. It will be bigger and have more accomidations. You will be stationed closer to my own... so that I will not have to stalk all over my home just to get to you. Also, you will be meeting the grounds seemstress. Your old clothing was useless to you now, and if you are to be training, you need appropriate clothing."  
  
She felt a swell of anger rise within her breast at the idea of her clothing burned. She had the biggest urge to swipe at Sesshomaru from where she stood, but she also knew it was to no avail. Besides, they were only clothes right? _'Clothes that had adorned your body for six years! Modified, stitched back together, washed multiple times!'_ She gave an outward growl, though it was not as loud as Sesshomaru's might have been.  
  
"Lord Sesshomaru, I would ask you that you refrain from burning my clothes the next time you find my clothing unrepairable. You could have just simply stated that you wished for me to not wear them in your presence, and I would have graciously bowed down to your command."  
  
She could feel her lips pulled back from her delicate fangs in what could only be considered an angry snarl. She reigned in her anger of course, stuffing it back under her mask with a quickness. Her eyes had starting to outwardly glow a pure white color in her rage, but as quickly as it had been, it disappeared to return her eyes to their two-tone hue. She watched as Sesshomaru had once again turned to meet her gaze. He did not seem insulted that she had grown angry towards him. Nor did she see a death-glare upon his face. Instead he just gave a quick bow of his head.  
  
"I will remember that next time miko."  
  
Then he was pushing open a thick mahogany door with a design engraved in the grains. She did not linger on the design for long before her eyes were opened large at the sight before her. The bedroom itself was larger than her past room, the ceiling was tall and on it was a painting of the sky at night, the moon was the focal point and of course it was in it's crescent phase. The painted scene was so realistic, Kagome had the urge to lay against the floor and watch it like she had in her past. A large set of glass doors lead out to her own balcony, which she would gladly use. Three doors lead from her bedroom into other rooms. The first one that was shown to her was her closet, which she considered larger than her old bedroom. There wasn't any clothing that was placed in there yet, as she had none of her own, but those that Sesshomaru let her borrow. From her closet they walked into what would be her private training area. For meditation, or practice that she did outside of Sesshomaru training her. She knew of course that she would take part of this room, but for now was interested what was behind the third door.  
  
Of course, she was hoping it was her own bathing area, and true to her wishes, that was what she walked in on. By no means was it as large as the public one had been. There was only one bathing area, but it was big enough for her to swim about in if she wished to do so. Two benches lined the wall, and there was a built in shelving area on one of the bathing areas 'steps', where bottles of what she could smell to be shampoo and soap. Some oils remained there, but she didn't pay them as much attention.  
  
"Does it fit your standards miko?"  
  
She turned to where Sesshomaru was standing, leaning against the wall, his arms crossed over his chest. He had been gauging her reactions to the rooms, and apparently he enjoyed what he saw.  
  
"Yes, more so than you know Lord Sesshomaru. Arigato."  
  
Her eyes looked over where she would be sleeping for the next.... however long she was to be here. A final thought flickered across her mind as they exited, and she turned back to see another door much like hers slightly down the corridor. Another room, right beside hers. The detail on the door looked much like a large dog demon, with a crescent moon on his forehead. She already knew the answer to this question, but she wished to hear the taiyoukai in front of her say it.  
  
"Who's room is next to mine?"  
  
She tilted her head down as she let a smirk play across her features as she waited for his answer. Did he really station her so close because he didn't like trekking all over his home to find her, or were their other reasons behind it?  
  
"My room is next to yours. Is that alright with you Kagome?"  
  
He turned to see her smile, which seemed to have an effect on him that Kagome wasn't expecting.  
  
"That is fine."  
  
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Sesshomaru stood against the wall of another room that they had visited. It was no bedroom, but it was the working area of the seemstress. A screen was blocking his view from Kagome and the other youkai that had string and a slice of parchment to record her measurements. In order to get the most precise measurements of Kagome's form, the seemstress, had required her to remove her clothes.  
  
Although he could see the miko's dark head over the screen, his vision path ended at her shoulders. She twisted her head to the side once, and he could see a small tinge of pink across her cheeks. Not only was she uncomfortable being in the nude with a woman she did not know, she was uncomfortable with the fact that the only thing that seperated her body from sight was a screen.  
  
Sesshomaru would have laughed at her modesty, but surprisingly he just took a bow out of her presence, giving her the simple statement to find him when she was done. As soon as the door closed behind him, he almost regretted it, and would have gone back in. This had been the most emotion that he had seen out of her since she had first come to him. Her smile from earlier at the mention of his room so close to hers, and now the blush of modesty.  
  
"There is still hope."  
  
He walked back to his room, digging around in his own closet. He wasn't looking to change just yet, but with a sigh he pulled out black fabric, which he caressed his hands over slightly before exiting. He had seen her anger at having her previous clothes destroyed, but he wondered what she would do when she realized that he hadn't in fact destroyed it. True, he had taken it from her, but he had sewn the ripped shoulder himself. And then he couldn't just bring himself to throw away her garments. Maybe he knew her anger, or maybe he wanted to keep it? He wasn't clearly thinking straight when he had pulled it into his own closet. He didn't know what he had been doing when he had awakened the other night, curled around the fabric like a puppy to it's owner.  
  
"Feh... it just smelled good, that was all."  
  
He pulled a tapestry away from his far wall, the one that connected with Kagome's room, and there was a small door that lead to her room. He had not shown her the secret door, because he didn't want her to know he had that much access to her room at the moment. Stepping through to her room, he looked around, just to make sure she had not yet entered from her session with the youkai, Tenya. Finally he stepped over, and set her outfit on her bed, smoothing out the wrinkles before he retreated back to his own room.  
  
She was starting to grow on him, even in this small time that she was in his presence, he seemed bitter to leave her side for even the smallest amount of time. If she had shown a smile and a blush within the same day, if he devoted himself to making her smile, then how much emotion could he get out of her if he stayed by her side at all times of day? _'Selfish.... Don't move too fast. She needs time..'_ He could give her time, that was what he could give her. They were both youkai, they had long lives to live.  
  
"Don't get ahead of yourself... it's only...friendship."  
  
The word made his ears twitch lightly. He could imagine the look of shock on his half brothers face at the mention of friendship, could even imagine what the hanyou would say.  
  
_His arms would be crossed over his chest, his face contorted into a jealous smirk before he lifted his chin up higher than earlier. 'Sesshomaru knows the meaning of friendship? I thought you were too pure-blooded to have emotions, or ideas of friendship Sesshomaru. What's happened to you, you getting attached? Worthless.'  
_  
He leaned his head back, before he heard the sound of anothers heartbeat outside his door. He made a noise to approve that they entered. He was calm and collected as Kagome entered, but his vision suddenly swam from the vision she created. He had a hard time masking his approval of her just that moment.  
  
She stood to her full height, though it was still just as delicate. Apparently Tenya had made an outfit quickly for the miko to wear before the rest of her clothes would be finished. As she walked further into the room, he could see her fluffy tail wave behind her, a special slit in the fabric to allow the appendage to wiggle out of her clothes and wave freely. The kimono was midnight black, and it fit her curves like a second skin, though it allowed her freedom of movement. Her sleeves were short, and showed off the markings on her arms. From the slight shimmer of the fabric in the afternoon light, it had to have been silk, with silver detail around the hems. As she drew closer, he could see the detail as intertwining crescents. Her obi was silver and pure. Her hair had been brushed, and it was left flowing down past her hips.  
  
He pulled himself away from the wall and made his way to stand before Kagome. He couldn't help but stare at the beauty before him. He held out his arm for her to take once again, and he couldn't help but to give an inaudible sigh as he felt her small limb weave ito his own.  
  
"Come, I will show you the rest of the gardens, I'm sure you'll enjoy them on a regular basis during your stay."  
  
She simple gave a nod of her cranium. Her pink lips pulled at the corner. Sesshomaru had been graced with another smile. _'You're beautiful...'_ At least that is what he wanted to say, but he couldn't. They exited his bedroom arm in arm.  
  
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Authors Note: No lyrics for this chapter. I'm well aware that that many could get rather annoying, so I will take a break from them. Besides, I could find none appropriate for this chapter. Forgive me for not thanking all of my reviewers personally. Just now that I am greatful for your words and encouragement. Enjoy!


	11. Children's Laughter, Sesshomaru's Gift, ...

Kagome's modesty was not all that had made her blush, of course it played a major factor in the pink hue of her cheeks. But it was also nervousness. Sesshomaru was a tough critic, and she feared that if he saw any part of her body, the cruel remarks would flow. She had never considered herself a beauty. She considered herself homely at best. But she did not have the wide hips of a woman, near the perfect skin of pampered humans or youkai. She might have been twenty-three in human years, but she still felt like a girl in her body. Felt like an alien in her skin, as if she did not fit in it anymore.  
  
Sesshomaru's graceful and perfect beauty, made her aware of her faults and mistakes, and she wished to hide from that fact. Sesshomaru was nothing more than an aquaintance, a friend. And when exactly had she started to think of him as a friend? Not that it really mattered. She might have wished to have a friendly relationship between them, but Sesshomaru probably still looked to her as a ningen, one that she no longer was. The seemstress had been quick and kind, telling Kagome that she could dress once again, though she bid her to wait. To have a full wardrobe that was expected of her, it would take Tenya at least a week to complete, as she had help, if she was by herself, it would take two. But she promised that she could make a quick outfit for Kagome to wear for the rest of the day, and possibly another one for tomorrow.  
  
Kagome had waited as she was asked of, sitting on the floor, her back against the wall. Her tail had started to wave frantically through the air as she continued to think on Sesshomaru. What did a taiyoukai use to keep themselves going through life? What was Sesshomaru's reason for continueing to live? Kagome had found it hard to even breathe after the death of her friends, and even now she did at night, where her tears sobbed out but her cheeks remained dry. As a matter of fact, why did she keep going? Why didn't she just let her sorrow drown out her heart? What kept her going through a life that had left her all alone?  
  
Was it because of the Shikon No Tama? No, she didn't quite think so, because if she died, her reincarnation would become the protectress of it, so she could not say it was because she had to protect the jewel. Was it because she was still fighting evil in the world? Naraku was dead, and there had not been any serious threat to the world as she knew it to provoke her instincts to protect. It could not be because she wanted love in her life, a love that would last, and not be jeopardized by the past. Did she even have enough left to love again? Did she want a companion? But did she also want the pain that came along with a friend? To see them hurt or injured, to see them stumble through life just as she had?  
  
_'You live for the prospect of the present. You have lived for the past, and you have lived for the future. You have taste of both, but you were never given the chance to simply live in the present. That is why you keep going.'_  
  
For once, she could not argue with the words she heard in her mind, provided by the youkai in her. It seemed like a fruitful statment. While she was in her time, before the well and the Shikon No Tama, she worked for the future, she studied and went for an education so that in the future she would do well in life. In the past she fought not only for the safety of the past, but for the safety of the future as well. She had never been allowed to just stand there in the river of the present, and enjoy what was around her. _'And what exactly is around you Kagome? You know what is out there for you to grasp, you're just too scared of being hurt again to admit it.'_ The voice was starting to annoy the miko, but only because it was right. _'Say it, what is out there, waiting for you?'_ The two-toned eyes closed as a pained expression overtook the miko. _'Sesshomaru is there, life is there...'_ But was Sesshomaru willing to be the one to be part of the present?  
  
Her thoughts were broken when Tenya came back into the room, holding out the black kimono for the miko to grasp.  
  
"I put into my measurements your tail, so from now on all your clothing will have a slit for your tail to fit through. I am aware that might be more comfortable, so I hope you do not mind the adjustments that I have made for you."  
  
Kagome stood up, and took the kimono into her hands delicately, the silver obi thrown over the fabric as well. She gave the seemstress many thanks and praise for her work, before the miko youkai disappeared behind the screen once again to don on her new clothing. She left her old kimono there, as it had not been hers to begin with. Finding a brush in the room, she took to the task of brushing out her long hair. She could not reason why she wished to look her best for Sesshomaru, but it was, in the back of her mind, nagging at her to look the perfect youkai for when she met him again.  
  
Once she was as satisfied as she could get, she took a final look towards Tenya before she exited the room. As she paced down the corridors, she felt her hands wringing themselves silly. She could not name why butterflies were flickering around in her stomach. Was it because she desperately needed Sesshomaru to approve of her? She needed him to enjoy her company, and her physical form. But why? _'Will I feel more important if I am approved? Will I feel accepted? What could it do to me if he does not approve of me?'_ A breeze blew through her mind, and she could almost imagine the vision of a youkai in her mind, young and smirking with a roll of her eyes. _'It would hurt you of course, Sesshomaru is the epitomy of grandeur and beauty. He makes those around him itch for approval.'  
_  
Finally coming to stand outside of his rooms, knowing that he was in there for the scent that flowed from the closed door. Earlier, her thoughts of him had been interrupted, and she had never once began to mentally describe to herself the taiyoukai's scent. It was true that emotions did not falter his scent, but it seemed more open then it had six years ago. The scent itself was full of.... the sky, and what Kagome could only name as stillness. She could not describe it any other way. He smelled of the sky and stillness. In the end, all that mattered, was that he smelled such a way that made Kagome stop whatever it was that she was doing, and be filled with the overpowering urge to nuzzle into his neck for the need to be filled with more of it.  
  
She could feel her heartbeat start to pound against her chest at such thoughts. Just a friend! She leaned her head against the door before she jerked back, hearing Sesshomaru give her permission to enter. Taking a deep breathe and letting her control slide back into place, her face solid but yet softer than it had been. She entered his room, meeting his golden gaze as he walked towards her. Tilting her head back as the taiyoukai was now only a foot away from her, she heard his words, and snaked her arm through his, feeling another smile spread across her features lightly without permission.  
  
The gardens, yes that was where they were going. Finally, she had to tear her gaze away from him as they started to walk.  
  
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Unbeknownst to the two youkai's that now walked through the gardens, their arms still entwined, there were two sets of eyes looking down on them now. There might have been an evil presence over them, but now there was nothing but pure intentions. The owner of both sets of eyes could not be sensed, for they were no longer part of the earth, and yet they were not souls wandering over the land. They were simply the souls of two who wished to see the two people below them to once again find happiness.  
  
"Do you think their gonna kiss soon?"  
  
A giggle was sounded behind the first speaker, causing the green eyes to turn to the giggler.  
  
"Wha's so funny? You saw how they were lookin' at each other earlier."  
  
Another giggle, before the person who made it came dashing towards the scene, leaning over the low cloud in order to do so. Brown eyes widened slightly before the girl giggled again.  
  
"Sesshomaru-sama and Kagome-chan look comfortable together. Rin is happy to see this."  
  
Shippou and Rin looked to each other once again, before returning their gazes back to the couple. The kitsune and the girl had found each other after death, their mutual love for those below them being the magnent that drew them together. They were consumed with the need to draw the two together, playing a little bit of fate between their small hands. Each one knew about the danger that was fast approaching, but they would not let the love be lost between the two.  
  
"Their going to slow though Rin-rin. If their not together by the time Kikoryo attacks, they will never survive. What are we going to do?"  
  
Shippou had by now begun to whine, and Rin scooted closer to the kitsune and patted him childishly on his head.  
  
"Flowers are the answer Shippou-chan. Get one of them to pick flowers for the other!"  
  
Such a childish answer, but both took it into real consideration before they disappeared.  
  
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Sesshomaru cast sideways glances once in awhile to wander across Kagome's features, or her streaked hair. He had taken much time to etch each detail of the miko youkai into his mind, but it was never enough. They had visited only half of the tame gardens on his grounds, while they hadn't even visited the hillside meadows where Rin had scattered tons of seeds. Wildflowers and such growing in wild abandonment. With the sudden thought of mention of Rin, memories of how she used to dance around the flowers, picking handfuls upon handfuls before returning to Sesshomaru's side, and offering them up to him in gesture. He remembered how proud she looked when she gave him the bouquet, and how happy she seemed when she was offered a flower in return.  
  
Of course the poor petals and stem never lasted long in the tight-gripped love of the child, but she seemed content to be offered another. Of course Sesshomaru had never picked a flower for the girl in Jaken's presence, he was always guarded in front of the toad-demon. Speaking of which. Turning to Kagome, his thoughts were brought back to the day she had restored his arm.  
  
"I have been wondering this ever since it happened, but I haven't thought of it till now. The day you restored my arm, why was it that your powers flared up? You seemed to have impeccible control over them."  
  
He watched as the faint blush once again visited upon her features as she turned her gaze away. Apparently being reminded of how she could have killed Sesshomaru with her powers pained her more than he had thought they would. Pulling her arm from his, as if she was readying herself to be reprimanded, or attacked for her actions, she stepped away from him with a sigh.  
  
"I did not take into effect that your youkai servant Jaken would interfere. I hadn't seen him since I had been here, so I thought nothing of his approach, or his assumptions jumping to the worse. He thought I was attacking you I suppose. He ran up before I could react and whacked me upside my head with his staff. It was all that I could not to let my powers kill you. I reigned them back in, but you had been mentally injured from it already. Gomen Lord Sesshomaru, I have pained for my mistakes."  
  
He could smell salt as tears started to well up into her eyes. Did she really think he was mad with her? Now he was aware of where the pain to his head came from. Apparently he was linked to Kagome, and he had felt the pain of Jaken's staff hitting her. Suddenly, the realization of what happened brought his rage to the surface. To think that Jaken had hit his guest, and had caused his master injury made Sesshomaru's eyes redden. He looked to Kagome, and saw her back up more from his person as she saw the eyes. Quickly, they faded and he stepped to her, pulling her into his arms quickly.  
  
"I am not mad at you Kagome, I mad at Jaken for his foolishness. He will pay for such actions, once I find him of course."  
  
The tears never fell, but he could still sense she was sad over what had happened, and it gave him the distinct feeling that she would never forgive herself for what had happened. Rin's face once again flashed in his mind, her holding up a flower to him with a smile on her face. Why not? He looked around, leaning down and plucking a blue bell from the ground, before straightening up and offering it to Kagome.  
  
She sniffed lightly, as if she had truly cried. Holding her hands close to her chest, he watched as her tail flickered slightly behind her in question. She turned her gaze from his to the flower in his hand so many times he thought she might grow dizzy from it. Fearing that she would reject the flower, he was close to throwing it over his shoulder before he watched her take it from his hands lightly. She brought it up to her nose, pulling in it's scent lightly. He was about to warn her to watch it, but felt a smile tug at his lips when she pulled back, and yellow pollen adorned the tip of her nose. She started to sneeze violently, and that brought laughter from Sesshomaru.  
  
Flipping her head from side to side from sneezes and trying to wipe the pollen off with her free hand, it made an amusing sight to Sesshomaru, who continued to laugh at the miko youkai, well not exactly at her, but with her at least. Finally he leant a helping hand and with a thumb, wiped off the pollen from her nose, and watched as she smiled back at him in embarressment. Placing the flower behind her ear, she gave a bow to the youkai.  
  
"Gomen Lord Sesshomaru."  
  
Once again, he brushed his thumb over her nose, though he did not remove his thumb until it brushed across her cheek. He was giving himself the excuse that she had somehow gotten pollen on the smooth skin as well, but he would be lying to himself.  
  
"My pleasure. Now, let us retreat inside, I have a few things I must do before dinner, I'm sure you look forward to bathing and returning to your new room."  
  
He took her arm and wrapped it around his before returning them inside the large house. After bowing good-bye to Kagome, he stalked off to his office. He would have to speak with that toad-youkai, and it would not be a good talk either.  
  
----------  
  
Rin and Shippou broke out into laughter as they both reappeared ontop of the cloud, watching Kagome fall into a sneezing fit, Sesshomaru laughing at the sight. It had worked out better than either of them had first thought. Not only did Kagome get a flower, but Sesshomaru laughed! Who would have thought?  
  
"Rin-rin, that was great! Sesshomaru should give flowers more often to Kagome-sama."  
  
Rin giggled, her eyes wide and she beamed with pride. She gave a curtsy, pulling her plain dress to the side, as was customary. Shippou bent at his small waist, flashing a toothy grin before he plopped down. Looking up to the sky above them, he only wished that when the time came, Sesshomaru and Kagome would be able to stand up against the threat that was coming for them. He truly did wish to see his surrogate mother again... and just if. If Kagome and Sesshomaru loved than.... He shook his head, best not to dwell on it now.  
  
Rin and himself had done all that they could do for the time being. Done more than they were really allowed to do. They couldn't interfere with fates work, but they could help push it along.  
  
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Kagome almost danced her way back to her room, pulling the flower from her hair so that she could look down at it once again. She smelled it once again, but this time she was cautious enough to not pull the pollen into her nose like last time. It had been a torturous few moments when she couldn't seem to stop sneezing, but to hear Sesshomaru laugh, it had been worth it all. She had been shocked to her bones from the offering, but not as shocked, nor pleased as when she heard his laughter. She hated to admit it now, because she thought herself smarter and more in control, but when she heard that humored sound, it had warmed her from her toes to her ears.  
  
Did he know how it affected her? She doubted it. Pushing the door to her room open, she waltzed her way to the side of her bed, where a small table sat. Placing the flower down, she held her hands over it, palms flat out. She closed her eyes and focused on the lavender swirl of power inside. She imagined the light flowing down her hands to rain onto the petals. Willing the light to preserve the flower, to keep it new and fresh. When she opened her eyes, she saw that already the petals had widened, and seemed to glow softly with her power inside of it's petals and stem.  
  
Then turning to go to her bathing area, she halted as she saw a speck of black against the white of her bed. Whipping her gaze about quickly, she swiftly jumped onto her bed, and gathered the fabric into her arms. Sesshomaru hadn't burned her clothes, he had kept them, and from the feel of it, had repaired the ripped fabric. Why she felt such a deep connection to the clothing was beyond her. All she knew, was that it was hers, and truly the only thing that she owned besides her life. With a curious flicker of her ears, she bent her nose to the fabric and sniffed. She could smell a slight twinge of blood, sweat from her travels. The air around her as she walked, but then she smelled Sesshomaru, more than was necessary. His scent was all over the fabric, as if he had held onto it. She pulled back, looking at it with a new light.  
  
Why had Sesshomaru kept her clothing from her? Did it really offend him.... or... She shook her head, banishing such thoughts from her head. Standing once again she walked towards her closet, folding the outfit and leaving it in a drawer before walking to the bathing area. Her friends had always thought her weird for how she bathed twice to three times a day, it depended on what she felt like. She liked to remain clean, and now that she had the senses of a youkai, she liked to keep her scent as clean of elements around her as much as she could. On her at the moment, she could smell the newness of her kimono, could smell the sunshine and the air. She could smell the sweetness of the gardens, and she could smell Sesshomaru, from when he had embraced her.  
  
A blush crept up her cheeks at the thought. It had been nothing more than an embrace to calm the miko when she had assumed she would be punished for letting her power get out of control. It had lasted all of one minute, and than it was gone. Why had she enjoyed the feel of his arms around her again?  
  
Disrobing and slipping into the warm water, she let all of her thoughts slip from her mind as she relaxed in the water, letting her body float. She did not have to appear in front of Sesshomaru till dinner, she could just take a small nap in the waters....  
  
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Sesshomaru was pacing in front of his desk. His anger had flared to life again as he remembered Kagome's explanation of what happened the other day. Of how Jaken had 'whacked' her with his staff. She was his guest! He would be damned if he let his guests be treated like animals during their stay, and worse yet, Kagome was.... she was.. well, Kagome was his...f-fr-friend! It sounded so ridiculously corny when he thought it, but it was true. Kagome was his friend, if at the least. _'Are you trying to assume she is more than that?'_ An eyebrow was cocked in fascination while Sesshomaru stuttered at his thoughts. _'No, she isn't more than that!! It's just that....'_ He was baffled at why he suddenly drew up a blank. He was trying to reach for excuses, or reasonings, but they abandoned him at the moment. With a mental scream he slashed at his youkai with a snarl. _'IT'S JUST THAT I WANT HER TO BE MORE THAN JUST A FRIEND!!'_ His youkai slinked back into the darkness, wearing a satisfied smirk on his face. Sesshomaru had said exactly what it was trying to point out.  
  
He sighed and collapsed ungracefully into a chair in front of his desk. There, he had said it. he wanted to be more than friends with Kagome. Not necessarily mates, but he ached at the thought of her leaving any time soon, and having her as a friend wasn't good enough. He wanted her to be his, and only his. Whether or not that was love, he could not say. But it hurt to know that Kagome was stuck behind some shell of little emotions.  
  
He would have cried then and there, if he had not heard the knock at his door. He snarled his permission for whoever it was to enter. He could tell instantly that it was not Kagome, and so he did not care. He stood up and turned around, only for his previous confusion and pain to disappear under the weight of his anger. Jaken was standing before him, his head bowed and his hands clutching at the staff of two heads.  
  
"Lord Sesshomaru, you wished to see me?"  
  
He would not explode just yet, no he would wait. So instead of attacking the toad at that moment, he walked behind his desk and sat down, trying to keep a facade of calm on his face. He looked to the toad, and motioned for him to come closer.  
  
"Yes, this Sesshomaru wished to see you. I wanted to speak on a certain subject, of a certain miko...."  
  
Without another word coming from his mouth, Jaken had exploded into speech.  
  
"Yes! I saw her the other day, it looked as if she was trying to hurt you, so I hit her with my staff. She knocked me out cold with her power. When I woke up you were gone, and the servants would not tell me where you were. I was in a panic about your health Master! How did you rid yourself of the miko, did you kill her?"  
  
Finishing, Jaken looked up to Sesshomaru, only to squak out in fear and jump back. Sesshomaru's eyes were dark red, his lips pulled back in barely controlled rage. The youkai jumped over the desk, vaulting himself with his arms, which Jaken took the time to notice he had both arms once again. Within seconds, his neck was being squeezed by Sesshomaru's large hand.  
  
"You are to never attack the miko again! She is my guest, and will be staying with me for training. She is a full youkai now, and must be treated with respect. You dared to hit my guest once, you will never dare to do it a second time. If I hear of you giving the miko youkai disrespect, or harm her in any way, it will lead to your early demise. Do you understand this Sesshomaru?"  
  
He could feel the toad gulp under his hand, his eyes wider than nomral as he started to scream all forms of acceptance that he knew. With a satisfied snarl, Sesshomaru strode to the door of his office before opening it and throwing the toad out with a growl. He did not wait to see where Jaken landed, before he slammed the door back and paced to his desk. Breathing harshly, flexing his claws in and out, he finally had enough control to let the youkai slip back into the darkness.  
  
He wouldn't let anyone hurt his Kagome. _'Your Kagome?'_  
  
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Authors Note:  
  
**kojika85**: Once again, thank you very much for your encouraging words! Hope you continue to enjoy the story.  
  
**inukagonly**: Of course the deaths of everyone was a very despairing moment, but some will find peace in later chapters.  
  
**PyroKitten**: No, no dying! I update as fast as I can.  
  
**xXSyaoranLuverPinayXx**: Being a novelist has been a dream of mine for many years, I have just always doubted my ability to write well. Thank you for your compliments and I hope you enjoy it.


	12. Sesshomaru's Death, Gomen

Kagome's slight body had continued to drift through the waters, her breathing had slowed down to the point of sleep. Not that she was necessarily tired, but the warmth of the water, and the unclenching of her muscles was relaxing enough. Her face always seemed to hurt after an entire day and keeping one's emotions hidden. She was soon to awaken, realizing that she had spent long enough in the water.  
  
She would have been standing up, had something not brushed against her mind. She would have snapped her eyes open if she could, but she didn't feel in complete control of herself at the moment. Another demon, but it wasn't any of those that she had encountered during her stay with Sesshomaru. No, this was a different one. His presence slid up against her mental thoughts and she was drowning in the blackness. Naraku had just made her grimace and fidget under his 'evilness', this one however.  
  
Her mind felt under attack as he ravaged through her mind, trying to find pieces of herself. Her memories and her weaknesses. He was trying to size her up, in the most noticeable of ways. Throwing up her miko barriers to try and block him out, she thrashed in the water from the pain of it. She might have become stronger with her powers since Naraku, but no matter how much she progressed, she could not block out the demon that was ripping up all her thoughts.  
  
She stood up in the water as far as she could, gripping at her temples with a growl slipping from her throat. She couldn't use any of her youkai abilities yet to block this intruder out, and he knew it. She slipped up onto the stones of the floor, laying on her stomach. She pulled her head up only enough so that her mouth could have an open airway to scream. Taking a breathe, and remembering the fear that was starting to grip her, she gave out a scream that would remind anyone of the old Kagome.  
  
"SESSHOMARU!!!"  
  
She could hear it boom through the room, and no doubt the sensitive ears of the dog demon would be able to pick up the sound easily. Curling in on herself, she waited for help, mentally fighting a losing battle.  
  
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He had been leaning back at his desk, his eyes had been closed. He was still trying to figure up where the statement of My Kagome, had come from. It was probably in the best regards that he did not say such a thing in front of Jaken, or the toad might just kill over in complete shock. A slight pain had started to nag at his brain, which he quickly extinguished with a flick of his wrist. He did not contribute the pain to the link that had unknowningly been made betwee the miko and himself during her restoration of his arm.  
  
He did not move into action before he heard his name being screamed with enough strength to shake down the very walls of his home. Jerking to his feet, having to hold his hands over his ears from the pain of the noise, he felt his heart stop. There was only one person in the entire estate that would dare say his name without the formalities, and there was only one woman that could now make his heart skitter at the idea of danger.  
  
Kagome. He raced from his study, not caring if the servants that seemed to peek their heads from their rooms at the noise were surprised by their Master's reaction. Only a white blur down the hallways till he quite literally busted down her bedroom door. He threw his gaze around, but he did not sense her heartbeat in this room. Pulling his gaze to the door of her bathing area, that was where her scent was the strongest, and the scent of another.  
  
He barely had enough to contain the rage in him as he pulled open the door. He expected to see some sort of menace standing over Kagome, on the verge of her death, but instead he saw the crumpled body of a wet miko on the floor. Her black hair and tail kept most of her skin from his eyes, but the overwhelming scent of fear and pain was rolling off of her like the ocean. Racing over to her side, he lifted her in his arms, checking over her body to see any signs of injury. He did not take the time to admire whatever it was that he saw. Concentrating on her facial expressions as they flickered from determination, to rage, to pain and then fear.  
  
"Kagome? What is wrong?"  
  
Her eyes flickered open, as she gave a hiss of pain. Just the soft light of afternoon streaking into the room was enough to fry her eyes. She threw her arm over her face, trying to block it all out.  
  
"There's a d-demon ransaking my th-thoughts."  
  
She dared not say anymore, or the barriers that she withheld would slip and he would have complete control over where and what he went to. She started to shake in the taiyoukai's embrace as she was aware of what the intruder did. He started to rip through her memories, pulling up at first one's that were long ago, before she had even known of Sengoku Jidai. They were normal memories of a child living life. Days she scraped her knee's from running too carelessly. Days that she climbed up into the God Tree, and sent her Gramps into livid fits. The day her brother suddenly appeared. Then, as if knowing that the others were closely guarded, he dug deeper. He started to pull up memories of the silver-haired hanyou, the most specific one's where she had caught him in the company of the dead miko. Her pain and anger was starting to grow as more visions of the two filtered through her brain. She would not allow this intruder to destroy what she had spent so many years building up. More and more images of the hanyou flashed, soon it was all of her friends. Visions of her friends dead, adorning the ground with their blood spilled. These were not real, he was starting to generate his own in order to weaken her defenses. She saw her little Shippou laying on the ground, dead, and pointing a small finger at her in damnation. One more vision, one more image and she snapped.  
  
Her eyes flew open again, and this sight gave Sesshomaru enough motivation to scurry back from the miko, within safe distance, for he knew what was coming now. Her eyes were glowing pure white as her youkai pushed through. But it was the lavender light that was starting to surrond her body that gave him fear. She floated up off the ground, her toes hovering inches over the stones. Her fangs were revealed as if she might snap at the intruder. With one command, the combining light of her miko and youkai exploded out from her body.  
  
"Get out!"  
  
He had to cover his eyes from the vision, but what he did see was a slightly black blur fly from her forehead. He was sure if there had truly been a demon in the room, they would now be nothing more than dust against her attack. As soon as the light was gone, she collapsed onto her knee's. This was Sesshomaru's que to once again enter. Stepping over lightly to the fallen miko, he picked her up once again from where she had fallen. She was no longer wet, as no doubt the immense heat of her anger had dried off the water droplets.  
  
He made his way to her bed, and pulled the sheets back with one hand, while the other supported the miko, somehow between the bathing area and her bed, she had wrapped her arms around his neck, her face pressed tightly against the juncture of his shoulder and neck. Forcing the fact that the miko was naked and in his arms from his thoughts, taking with it the fact that she was nuzzling against one of the most sensitive spots on his body, he tried to lay her on the bed, but did not succeed to stand back up. It did not seem that she was going to let him go anytime soon, not that he could blame her. It was never an easy thing, to have your thoughts ripped apart by an invading demon. It was then he became aware that Kagome was speaking in his direction.  
  
"Please don't leave, not yet. I can't let you leave, I'm so scared..."  
  
He blinked once, then twice. Her defenses were down, her emotions were flooding through. He could smell the tears as they started to track down her face from it. With a simple nod, he pulled the covers up over her nude form before laying down, making sure the blanket kept them seperate, though her arms would not lessen. What more had the demon done to give her such a scare? She mumbled as she buried herself against his chest, her tail laying across his side. He felt a shield of power surrond them, which only made him more curious. As he felt her slip into consciousness, he timidly reached out to touch her mind. He had to see the damage. As he entered, he caught the remnants of an image that the demon had left her to be haunted by.  
  
He could see himself sleeping in his chambers, his face peaceful in sleep. The covers covered only to his waist, leaving his chest bare. A shadow materialized from the corner of his room, slinking over to the bed. Jumping up to straddle his hips, the visionary Sesshomaru awakened with only enough time to see the face of his attacker, before a sword was plunged through his heart. He pulled back from the image, but could feel the despair that had flooded Kagome's heart at the vision. He pulled her closer, if it was possible. She was trying to protect him, from a threat that might not even be real.  
  
She never ceased to amaze him.  
  
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Kikoryo had been shoved from the miko youkai's mind by her eruption of power, but not before he got what he really wanted. He was starting to bore of watching the two of them flicker and dance around each other. He didn't think he could wait as long as it seemed it was going to take. So while he had revealed his presence to the woman and the youkai at her side, he now knew her weaknesses. Her friends were still a sore subject with her, but the two that set her off the most was the little kitsune, and Sesshomaru.  
  
It had been the vision of Sesshomaru's death that had given her the determination to blast him away. It had been that image that had corrupted her calm exterior. Her mask was broken, and he had seen all of her weaknesses. It had been educational indeed, and he would have to use all that he had found to his advantage.  
  
He would attack her sooner then he had originally planned, the Shikon No Tama would be his, and after seeing the miko's powers, he might just have plans for her. If he could keep her under his spell, she could do his bidding. She was powerful in her own right, she would make a great asset to his rise of power. He didn't have to kill her right away, not before she has used up her usefulness.  
  
Brushing himself off from the mental attack, he stood, resting his eyes once again on the home of the taiyoukai and grinned.  
  
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Rin and Shippou had been very aware of what Kikoryo had done to Kagome, for they had been watching from the cloud during the whole thing. Rin was silent in her anger, but poor little Shippou had been furious. Threatening to jump down from his cloud and teach that demon a few lessons, Rin finally had to sit on him to quiet him.  
  
"At least they know of the threat and will have time to prepare now. At least it isn't a surprise attack anymore."  
  
Shippou whined from his position under the small girl, tapping his claws against his chin as he glared at the retreating form of Kikoryo.  
  
"But Rin-Rin! He made Kagome cry! He hurt her! Not only that, but he knows her weaknesses. How come no one fights fair anymore. Naraku would have been so easy if he fought fair!"  
  
Rin petted the kitsune on the head once again, trusting that she could slip off of his back and not have him trying to go after the offending demon in anger anymore.  
  
They sat side by side on the cloud, looking down to the image of Sesshomaru and Kagome curled on the bed. It had the desired effect on the kitsune. He gave a happy sigh, to see that the two was at least close enough to do that.  
  
"Rin believes that everything will be okay. They'll find their way to each other. You'll see Shippou."  
  
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Kagome had awakened to find herself still hopelessly curled around the taiyoukai, having pushed the blanket out of the way, and using her tail for decency. She did not blush, nor gasp and try to cover herself, nor start to babble about being this close to such a man. Instead she slipped out of the bed, glad for her silence as he still slept. Her bathing had been interrupted, and she had never had the actual chance to fully wash herself. Returning the shield over Sesshomaru, she padded over to the bathing area.  
  
Instead of slowly sinking herself into the water, she sort of hopped into the water, and tucked her limbs in so that she might not hit the sides or the bottom. She felt dirty, mentally dirty. Her thoughts were in disarray and her memories had been scattered. Nothing was as it had been before the attack. The images he had presented to her remained at the foremost part of her mind, teasing her with their morbidity. It was true that she did enjoy adventure, but she did not enjoy it when her mind was being ransaked from someone who wished to possess the Shikon No Tama.  
  
Finally pulling her head from the water so that she could breathe, she took the tedious task of washing her hair first as she audibly grumbled.  
  
"How come enemies can't have any decency? He could have just stepped up and said politely that he wished to fight me to the death so that he could have the Shikon No Tama. He didn't have to invade my privacy and such nonsense."  
  
The idea of Naraku doing such a thing, or Kikyou pronoucing she wished to fight for her soul once again, or this new threat doing the same, sent a mental image so obsurd into her thoughts that she instantly giggled from it.  
  
"No, I suppose that would be too much to ask for. They have to maintain their 'evil' image, don't they?"  
  
After pulling up her length of hair and filling it all with suds, she ducked her head back under so that she might wash it all away. Repeating this process with her body, she finally stepped from the waters feeling much more clean and rejuvinated. She wrapped a towel around her body, another was wrapped around her hair, and of course, a smaller towel for her tail. Stepping back into her bedroom, she was greeted by Sesshomaru, he was sitting against the headboard, his legs crossed under him.  
  
"Would you mind to release this shield? I fear for my life if I try to leave the bed."  
  
He gave her such an irritated glare, with his arms crossed over his chest, his head tilted ever so slightly. She wondered how long he had been awake, and how long he had been sitting there, staring at the miko shield with a glaring eye. With a wave of her hand she let it disappear, and broke into laughter as she sat on the edge of the bed, pulling her tail into her hands and slowly starting to dry off the fur.  
  
"Gomen Lord Sesshomaru, I did not think you would awaken before I returned."  
  
When she looked his way again, she was surprised to see his face relaxed and open as he gave a shrug. He yawned, and slipped back down so that his head could be cushioned by a pillow. Keeping his gaze towards her, and for some reason that didn't upset her usual need for modesty.  
  
"Gomen as well for forcing you to lay beside me. I did not mean to cause you any distress or irritation. I just... feared for mine and your life at the moment."  
  
Another shrug was sent her way, but she saw his lips curl at the corners. It wasn't a big smile, but it was enough incentive to keep her eyes on him.  
  
"I was not forced into anything. I could have easily broken your hold if I so wished. But I wished to keep you as comfortable as you could be at the moment, and if that was for me to stay, then it was of no problem to me. Besides, what is so horrible with sleeping beside a nude youkai?"  
  
She snapped her gaze back to the taiyoukai, as she had taken her gaze from him long enough to see that her tail was once again dry, and she had been in fact rubbing the air with the towel for quite some time. His smile had widened, and laughter was spilling from his mouth. She gave a fake gasp, as she jumped to her feet on the bed. Brandishing the towel as if she would snap it on his leg or arm, she went after him.  
  
"Oh, is that all? Why did you not just take advantage of me then!"  
  
It wasn't as if it was all real. They were both joking on some level, simply releasing nervous energy from earlier. Kagome would never know that Sesshomaru had been speaking the truth about his last statement. Sesshomaru would never know how much Kagome enjoyed the short rest. They chased each other around her room, though Sesshomaru always seemed so much more graceful then she did.  
  
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Sesshomaru would never have admitted to anyone but himself, and maybe the woman that he was now chasing, that he was having fun. Somehow the tables had turned, and he was the one that had the offending towel, threatening to now whip it across her bare legs. Not that was his actual goal was to whip her with the towel, he was just trying to pin her down. Finally giving himself a final push, he happened to wrap his arms around his waist. They both fell to the bed, Sesshomaru keeping her pinned as her legs flailed about.  
  
Finally she subdued, laughing at the situation that they were in. THe towel for her hair had long ago fallen, and her damp locks had fallen down, wetting the bed beneath her, and small droplets hitting Sesshomaru's hand as he braced himself over her. With a smile, he had been close to sitting up, and leaving her to dress. That is, until his nose picked up a very peculiar scent. He could smell the overbearing odor of her soap and shampoo, but something was starting to tickle his nose.  
  
He slowly started to sniff through all the scents. Then suddenly, it was there, blooming under his nose. Thick and musky. He fought with himself then. To pull away from her, or to stay and draw that scent in. She didn't seem to understand that she was in heat, if she had, she wouldn't have continued to walk around him like she had, would she? He wanted to just bury his nose against her neck and just draw it all in, but it was having strange effects on him. His youkai was growling at the edge of his thoughts, sceaming at him the most primal orders. 'Take her! Make her your mate!'He snapped at the voice, only to come back to himself, with his nose planted firmly against the woman's neck, his hands convulsing on her waist.  
  
"Sesshomaru?"  
  
Her voice was confused, disoriented. She sounded so innocent, as if she still wasn't aware of what was happening. How could she still not know? He gave a muffled groan as he pulled himself away from that sweet spot.  
  
"You're in heat Kagome. Are you aware of what that does to youkai males?"  
  
Her eyes widened, but good enough for her, she did not squirm under him, it would have just made it worse, for the both of them. He knew that by now his eyes had bled red, his youkai was screaming out more in his head, but he couldn't just listen to the demon. He wanted to own her, to make her his, and it wasn't just the scent that was telling him to do so. His feelings for her had grown in a large rate since he had seen her again. It wasn't love, not just yet, it couldn't be. But it was something akin to it.  
  
He pushed himself away with a growl, seperating her warm body from his. He shook his head as he tried to calm the youkai again.  
  
"I'm sorry Kagome."  
  
With that he turned and fled from her room. He had to get away, until she was no longer in heat, or she learned to mask it from him, which would be extremely hard to do. He couldn't claim her, not ever, and especially not like that. She would never take him as a mate.  
  
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Authors Note: Thank you to all who reviewed and encouraged me further. I'm sorry if this seems like a small chapter, I hope to have another up by tomorrow!


	13. I love you, I hate you

Kagome had watched in astonishment as Sesshomaru had pinned her under his weight. He did not put more on her than he knew she could handle. She could still breathe, and her ribs did not feel as if they might break, but there was still a comfortable pressure on her body from his. It pulled at an urge inside to just take a deep breathe and fall asleep, feeling secure and safe under his weight. She had watched his face in those moments of stillness, where there seemed to be no movement of their bodies, nor any intention of moving at the moment. Then she had blinked, and she had found Sesshomaru's face close to hers, tilting it till his nose was pressed against her neck. At that very moment she couldn't say whether or not she was shocked to what he was doing, was distraught, or comfortable. It wasn't as if he was trying to harm her, though she wasn't really quite sure what he was doing.  
  
She was aware of his hands at her waist, kneading into her soft flesh. His grip was tight, as if he wasn't quite aware that he was doing it, but it still didn't hurt her as she had expected. She tried to pull his face towards her own, to look him in the eye, to try to get an answer from the taiyoukai. He wouldn't meet her eyes, kept pulling away so that he could once again bury his nose against her neck. She could feel the air brush across her skin as he exhaled, before drawing in more of her scent. Finally, she decided to speak, maybe that would break whatever had befallen the youkai on top of her.  
  
"Sesshomaru?"  
  
She was going to say more, truly she was, but her thoughts were taken off path when he pulled back slightly, a groan eliciting from his throat from the action. She watched his face as it turned to meet hers. His eyes were clouded, glazed over with something she could not decipher. Though she could tell from the sound of his strained voice, that whatever it was, he was having a hard time controlling. He was fighting against himself, and barely had enough to stay himself.  
  
"You're in heat Kagome. Are you aware of what that does to youkai males?"  
  
She drew in a deep lungful of air at his words. She wasn't quite sure what the scent did to youkai males, but she remembered with a fond memory Inu-yasha's reaction at this point of the month. The poor hanyou had retreated from her, keeping his distance as much as he could till it was over. And she had only heard very slightly of what it did to youkia's. It called to their demons, it called to their most primal urges, and here she was, in the taiyoukai's presence, half naked with only a towel to seperate them, and she in heat.  
  
She would not move though, she was afraid that if she moved, it would rip away his final barriers, and leave only his demon to deal with her. If things between Sesshomaru had herself was to escalate, she did not wish for them to happen in such a way that they were to now. She did not wish to be hurt by Sesshomaru, and she did not wish to harm him either. So instead she was as still and quiet as she could be, watching his red eyes and beautiful face with intent eyes.  
  
How relieved she was when he pushed himself off of her, retreating towards the door. She knew how hard it must have been for him, she could smell the need taking over his own natural scent. She watched as he shook his head, trying to clear her heat in order to think straight.  
  
"I'm sorry Kagome."  
  
She watched as he turned and disappeared from her room, leaving her on the bed, clutching at her towel with a white-knuckled grip. So she was safe now, he would retreat to where her scent could not reach him. He had enough control to leave her pure at the moment. So why did she feel so lonely after he was gone? Why did it feel like her heart was being ripped out of her chest once again?  
  
With a sigh, she resigned to finishing off her drying. It would do no good if she pranced about her room anymore with damp skin. Once she was done with that, she visited her closet, where no other clothes then her black kimono, and her original black outfit. She had nothing else to wear, and the kimono she had worn already that day. Donning the same outfit she had appeared in front of Sesshomaru in, she ripped a small hole in the derriere of the pants to allow her tail room. Pulling her hair back into the low-nape ponytail, but leaving small wisps to curl around her face.  
  
Placing herself back into her bedroom, she paced, looking more like the old Sesshomaru more than she realized. _'Alright, so he left. It's not like it's anything personal. Not like he hates me. He just couldn't stand the smell. Nothing personal Kagome....'_ A shift in her thoughts, reminding her of the need she saw in Sesshomaru's gaze when he looked down to her. _'It wasn't that he couldn't stand the smell little one, he wanted it too much. You know that... don't fool yourself.'  
_  
Flopping into a sitting position on her bed, she hung her head in her hands. She didn't want this, she didn't want to be attached to Sesshomaru, didn't want to depend on him for the emotions that she was secretly aching for. She was afraid to love again, afraid to trust again. But everytime she looked to his beautiful face, she couldn't help but to feel her defenses fall to his whim. He was not the Sesshomaru that had tried to deal death to his hanyou brother and herself. He was not the same Sesshomaru that she shivered in fright from. He had changed, and she found that he did not hate the change. Had this side of Sesshomaru always exsisted?  
  
These self-questionings were getting her no where by insane. She couldn't stand asking herself how he felt, while trying to evaluate what she felt towards him. She was a nervous wreak, and this little see-saw of emotions was helping. As she had done before to mask her youkai scent from Sesshomaru, she tried to weave the same magic, and mask her heat scent, though she was afraid it was only dulled down to a reasonable level, and not completely invisible from sensitive sniffers.  
  
She was set in her mind, and she would not be turned away until she got her answers. She stalked out of her bedroom, following his scent like a lifeline, not at all surprised that it lead to his office. It seemed that he was in that room more than he was in his bedroom. She could imagine him curling up on his desk with a blanket and sleeping there. Her steps were fast, and before she knew it, she was within reach of his office. That was before a certain toad held up his staff and halted her.  
  
"Lord Sesshomaru is not to be disturbed at the moment. It is his express orders and you are expected to obey them woman."  
  
She brought her two-toned gaze down to the offending demon before she leapt forward, snatching him up by the collar of his robe in her clawed embrace. Bringing her face close to his, her nose wiggling as if she possessed the whiskers of a true cat, she hissed in his face.  
  
"Make me obey."  
  
And then, once again the toad went flying down the hallway. She did not see nor care how far he flew, before hitting the ground and skidding to a stop. She didn't bother to look, before she shoved the study doors open and stepped in with an overpowering presence.  
  
Sesshomaru was sitting at his desk, his head planted softly in his hands. Kagome suddenly faltered at the sight, she could see small tears slip from the corner of his eyes, and it was then that she noticed his scent was full of confusion and lose. She slowly approached him now, wanting to know exactly what it was that brought the tears to his eyes.  
  
"Sesshomaru?"  
  
----------  
  
He couldn't let it happen, he had to stay strong in the face of adversary. He couldn't just let her slip by his defenses and break down everything that he had built up. He couldn't let Kagome stride into his life, juggle with his emotions, though she wasn't aware of what she did. It wasn't even her fault. He wanted her, he wanted to love her, to hold her and be the one that she came to when she was happy, sad, mad, hurt... anything. But he didn't know how to. He didn't know how to love her, didn't know how to comfort her, didn't even know how to treat her the way she might have expected him. Why did he even bother?  
  
He had told Jaken to keep all intruders out. He didn't care who it was, it could have been his father, but still he would not want his presence at the moment. He didn't want to be seen as he was at the moment. Lord Sesshomaru, Taiyoukai of the Western Lands was crying, over a woman!!  
  
Nor did it help when the woman being cried over was suddenly in front of him. He could hear Jaken's voice speak to her from outside, and at first he had thought by her silence that she might leave, but then he had heard her angry words, defying the toad to do the impossible, before she stepped in. He had tensed up, expecting her intoxicating scent to slam into him, thereby destroying what little control he had, but was surprised to sense it's muted flavors. She had tried to hide it, for his sake. It was still there, still tempting his nose, but it was not as overwhelming as usual.  
  
He looked up to her, when he heard her musical voice call out his name. Just as earlier, she was confused, out of place. She might have had something to say to him, from the urgency of her arrival, but now it had flew from the window at the tears she must have seen. He didn't try to hide them, didn't try to shoo her away. He just sat there, looking at her.  
  
"What is it that you want miko?"  
  
He watched her face turn into a frown at the sudden change of names. She had gotten so used to hear him speak her name, that now she felt drawn back when he used miko. She felt absent from him, felt as if there were miles between them instead of feet. He could feel her falter, could feel her start to retreat into herself at the word 'miko'.  
  
"There must be a reason why you have thrown my servant down the hall, bound in here as if you were going to tear down the walls. So why do you falter in your answer? I asked you a question, and I expect you to answer me with promptness."  
  
He was screaming at himself on the inside, to stop his speech before he began it. He was wrecking whatever he had with Kagome as he spoke, he could see her face start to fall, before she started to build back up the mask that had taken him days to break. She was retreating into her cold shell, because he was too. But if he did not speak to her as such, then she might smile at him and try to smooth things over. He would melt at the scene, and become more weak. She took another step back, her face still showing enough emotion for him to know that she was close to tears at this sudden transformation.  
  
With a snapped growl, he stood up quickly from his desk, slamming his hands down onto the wood top with a thunderous impact. He saw her body jump from the sound, how she curled her shoulders slightly in sudden fear from him.  
  
"You are wasting my time! If you cannot for one moment gather enough intelligence to tell me what it was you were going to converse with me about then I suggest you leave before I physically throw you from this room ningen!"  
  
He knew it was a mistake the moment that it slipped from his mouth. Ningen. A very bad mistake. She had been one for most of her life, but for the past six years she had been youkai. He had given her respect, he had even given her friendship, and now suddenly he was dumping that nasty word back on her, even his voice slithered at the word, trying to pour all his hate of humans into it. He didn't want to hurt her, but maybe if he did, she would leave and he wouldn't have to deal with his growing need to have her. He saw the tears slip from her eyes in rivulets, her lower lip quivering from the sobs that she held in her delicate body.  
  
He stopped his breathing at that sight, trying to figure out why it hurt him just as much to see her like that. Her entire body shook now as she tried to grip onto her emotions and pull them behind her mask. He saw her head bow down to hide her tears as she wrapped her arms around her chest. He slipped from behind his desk, stepping towards her with outstretched hand. No, he couldn't do this. He couldn't push her away from him like that, it wasn't within him. He couldn't hurt her like that.  
  
"Kagome...I'm sor----"  
  
His words were cut off when her head suddenly snapped up. Her eyes were flaring with hatred then, her youkai flaring up under her skin, reacting to her pain. Her hand came out of nowhere, and he could feel it cut across his cheek. His skin stung, and he could feel warm blood trickle down his cheek. He knew without seeing that her claws had left deep cuts in his flesh. She spat in his face squarely.  
  
"You bastard! You dare treat me like this.. to just open me up slowly, to pretend as if you actually cared, and then stomp all over my heart and soul. I could die from how idiotic I was to trust you, and to think that I.... that I was starting to love you! Some fool I was!"  
  
She threw something to the ground that had been tucked in the belt of her trousers, before she stomped on it and twisted her foot harshly. She glared at him one last time before she wheeled around, kicking open the double doors and taking off down the hallway. Sesshomaru was left there standing, in the biggest stun of his life. Her words were ringing harshly in his ears, but the one's that stood out the most were her last few.  
  
_'...love you.'_  
  
He felt his tears from earlier start to prick at his eyes, but now they originated from something besides his confusion. Looking down to the ground, and taking into his gaze the object she had flung, made his tears spring fresh from his eyes, and rip unforgiving down his stinging cheek. Crouching down, he pulled the flower into his hands, the petals broken and the stem snapped into many sections. She had kept the Blue Bell that he had given her, and from the fading light that was slipping into the floor, she had wished to preserve it.  
  
She had torn the flower apart, as he had done her heart. Looking back towards where Kagome's form had been, he pulled his head back in despair and howled out in self-hatred and rage. Standing before him had been a woman who had been willing to love him, to work with him with through it all, because they were both victims of hurt and pain, and there he had been standing, screaming at her and squeezing her heart in his cruel hands.  
  
----------  
  
Kagome had ripped herself from the study, covering her face with her hands. How she could have let herself fall into the trap, she did not know. She thought that she had learned from Inu-yasha, that she heard learned to keep herself safe from others during her six years of travel. _'Why did I even begin to think that something good to come of Sesshomaru? Why did I even try?'  
_  
She did not even bother to return to her room, she wouldn't stay there anymore with him, she couldn't stay there anymore, not after having her heart ripped from her chest. She ran past the stunned Jaken, ran past Sakuya the servant without a word. She flew through the entrance and kept running till she was safely within the shadows of the forest. She collasped into a heap at the base of no-particular tree, crying out her despair. _'I hate you Sesshomaru...'_  
  
She felt as if her heart might burst from the pain, that she would quit breathing right then and there and let the afterlife pull her soul down. What did it matter? Whatever promise there was for the present, was dashed into the ground by Fate's cruel foot. Her tears and her sadness served as a curtain over her senses, so she did not feel nor hear the approach of the demon. Did not hear his foot crack a twig, nor feel his evil intentions bear down on her.  
  
She was not aware of it at all, till a clawed hand ripped into her side. Her body arched in pain, while she tried to twist around and fight off her attacker. Her actions were no longer fueled by intelligent thought, but more or less by instinct. The hand tightened around something on the inside of her, making her eyes flicker in acknowledgement. The demon from earlier, he had waited for an opening to attack, and she had just given it to him. With a sickening sound of skin ripping, he pulled his hand back, to leave a hole in her side, while the Shikon No Tama stood out starkly against his red hand. Instead of glowing lavender, it was pure black.  
  
"No...."  
  
The demon kicked her to the side, bending over her and smiling before he popped it into his waiting mouth, and swallowed, successfully letting the jewel enter his body.  
  
"That's right my little miko. Those few moments of hate corrupted the jewel, and now it's mine."  
  
She tried to back up from the demon, to put together rational thought, but all she could summon was her denial. She was supposed to protect it, and within a few seconds of emotional pain, she had destroyed it's pureness, and had let it fall into another demons hands. She pulled her hand up, trying to summon up her miko powers and blast that bastard to hell, but the jewel had already done it's work, and with a speed quicker than any demons, he had leapt towards her once again, his hands squeezing her neck till she couldn't breathe.  
  
"I'm still confused as to what I am going to do with you. At first I was just going to kill you, make it easier on myself, but then I was thinking of making you my slave, wiping away your memory and putting you under the black jewel's spell. You would make a great asset to protect me from those that might wish to take the jewel from me.... but now I'm not so sure."  
  
Her own hands tried to rip at his, trying to find some slack that she might be able to breathe some air, but it was of no use. She tried to kick at him, tried to buck him off of her body, tried anything, but he suppressed her every move, by either his own physical body, or by a wave of the dark magic from the jewel.  
  
"If you keep irritating me, then I will just kill you here and now. You are aware that my patience is thin."  
  
She had somehow grabbed enough air to hiss back at him, spitting in his face as she had done to Sesshomaru.  
  
"Fine then, kill me, I don't care."  
  
His hands slackened then as he found defeat written clearly in her eyes. He flung her away from him then, watching as her body crumpled onto the forest floor. She did not even move to heal her wound, but instead stared up into the sky with what he could only describe as dead eyes. Fine then, he would keep her, because now he could find a better use for her. He would control her, use her for his protector, and slowly start to switch the powers of the land. Starting with the Western Lands.  
  
----------  
  
He didn't know what to expect. He had stayed in his study all night, afraid to trek back to his room, knowing that Kagome was so close. True, he had awakened the next morning sore and bruised from his sleeping spot in his chair. He hadn't even bothered to change his clothing, or bathe, he would do so later. His stomach was growling with the need to be fed, and he assumed the miko might show up at breakfast.  
  
He didn't know how to go about trying to fix what he had broken, trying to show her that he had reacted only out of fear, because he too didn't know what to do. He severely hoped that he had not completely wrecked whatever chance he had with Kagome, but his demon side was assuming the worst.  
  
He sat at the long table for many minutes on end, waiting for Kagome to show up, waiting to see her walk through the doors. She would not smile at him, but maybe she could just look at him once, if even he was given one look he would be okay. He grew agitated, worried, but he told himself he would not stand up and go to her room. He told himself that he was a taiyoukai and so he never had to go after anything in his life. 'But you must go after her!'  
  
He jumped up and fled the dining area, speeding through the hallways till he got to her room. He stood outside her door with apprehension suddenly gripping his heart. He placed his head against the door, and took a deep breathe.  
  
"Kagome? I wanted to speak with you about last night. I know what I did was unacceptable, I should not have spoken to you in such a way. I am sorry. I'm afraid of what is happening, I have never had a chance like this, and it frightens me that I do not know how to treat you. I don't know how to love you... and the only way I know how to eliminate problems is to mistreat them. I hope you could forgive me Kagome because... because I am in love with you."  
  
He heard no answer from within the room, but he heard a female clear their throat behind him. He should have known by the scent, but as he turned around, he was hoping that it was the woman he was hoping to speak to. Instead it was Sakuya. She was bending over at her waist, her face in a flush at having heard her Masters words.  
  
"Lord Sesshomaru, I thought it would be imperative to tell you that Lady Kagome is no longer here."  
  
His eyes narrowed at the servant in anger. If she found it so imperative, why had she not told him last night.  
  
"What do you mean she is no longer here?"  
  
It was almost a threat, his voice was low and dangerous, and on the border of his speech a growl was hanging in the air.  
  
"She ran from here last night, she left all of her belongings, but she has not been back since. She disappeared into the forest, and we have seen nor heard anything from her since."  
  
He felt his heart falter more then it had last night. Kagome had left? From the impression Sakuya was giving him, it was permanent. Without another word, the miko had fled from him, and into the forest. No doubt she had fled even farther away, maybe she had returned to the old woman's village. But he somehow doubted that. 'Kagome?' He dismissed the neko servant, her cat features bringing up Kagome's face with pained reality. He truly had lost her.  
  
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Authors Note: Alright, so emotions have been clarified on some level. Kagome has been taken, as well as the Jewel. We all know what is going to happen next. I was close to tears writing this chapter, I hate putting the characters through pain like that, but it was inevitable for the story to move along.  
  
Now, I have a question that does need to be answered by those that read my story and feel free to review. Somewhere in the story, a relationship will bloom of course, and I am in a bind as to whether or not I should write a.... 'love scene'. NOT A LEMON! It will not be rated XXX or anything. I am aware that in some stories the presence of such a scene might ruin the story, but on the other side of the coin it could add to it.  
  
I would just like to know what you, the readers would think. I would appreciate anything you have to say.


	14. Authors Note, Please Be Kind

I am so sorry to all those that read this story, I have been struggling with this next chapter and how to go about it. Also College has started once again and my spare time to write has decreased drastically. So I beseech you that everyone remain patient with me and do not give up on me yet! This story is still active and I will work on it every chance I get. Thank you for all those that remain.


	15. Kikoryo vs Sesshomaru

The Shikon No Tama was pulsing, drawing to it's attention every demon, human and creature alike that wished to obtain it's power. It was sought after, fought over. Demons begged and pleaded, humans tried to bribe. But all who tried, failed of course. It wasn't long till the stories of the bright demon Kikoryo and his youkai bodyguard had travelled all over the lands. Their origin was in question, who they were and why they had turned their backs against the world. No one who went after the jewel lived, not that it was Kikoryo that destroyed them, no it was his vicious bodyguard. Some debated that it might be stronger then Kikoryo himself. 'It' because no one had ever seen the gender, dressed in black with a mask covering it's lower face. Some might say female for the long hair, but many men in that era had long hair. The body was delicate and yet there was a terrible strength behind every single attack. The world had yet to know a female youkai that was even that ruthless, and yet they couldn't be sure it was male. Therefore, it.  
  
This lesson was one that many learned, including a certain bear youkai that was standing before the bright demon now, mouthing off about his superiority.  
  
"Therefore I should hold onto the jewel, you are nothing but a pup to me, and it should not be allowed for a child to carry so much power."  
  
He seemed so confident in his ability to win against whoever was thrown in his direction. His dark arms crossed over his chest. Look wise, anyone would say he looked intimidating. He could not have stood shorther than six foot seven, and all his height was dedicated to cords of thick muscle. He had strength, pure strength. His hands were massive, could probably span Kikoryo's head with skin left over. He had no weapons, since he seemed to be a fighter that believed it cowardly to use weapons, concluding in the end that he only needed his own body to fight.  
  
Kikoryo stared at him, matching his stance, silver eyes digging into his. He looked to the side, where the shadows seemed to be thickest. There were no words exchanged, but there was a shift in the air.  
  
"He might look tough indeed, but his scent gives away his fear."  
  
The voice was monotone, and yet deep underneath it all, there was a sly twist of the words as the figure stepped forward. Black clothing covered the person from head to toe, the black and white hair brushing down the backside of the person. A mask of black was tight over their lower features, but the voice did not seem muffled. The bear youkai took a small step back at the vision before him. The two-toned eyes took in this action, and a large growl rumbled from the person's throat.  
  
"You came here to fight for the jewel, so stand your ground and fight as a man. Do not attempt to run, it only serves to show that you are a coward."  
  
The harsh words did not seem to distill anger in the bear youkai, but instead made him take a step back. the figure in front of him might have attacked, had not the pale hand of Kikoryo stayed up across the small chest, a silent signal to wait.  
  
"Now now, no need to go and kill him. You always gave them a chance to run before you chased afterwards. It would not be fair to bereft him of this advantage."  
  
The bear youkai seemed ready to flee from his very spot, the dark presence didn't seem satisfied to leave the advantage open, and Kikoryo was the only one smiling. But finally, there was a slight nod of the dark head, acknowledging that no fighting would come at the moment.  
  
"You may now begin your flee if you wish, you will be allowed a graceful head start. I suggest you spend this time well in your journey to flee, my companion here is a master of speed."  
  
The smile started to falter, it's cheery disposition starting to fade, but the pale lips pulled back even more and something sinister passed across what some might consider a handsome face. The bear faltered in his first initial steps, his eyes transfixed upon the dark shadow that stood still at the bright demons side. Tripping over his own feet before finally turning around and fleeing into the thick boughs of the forest. Kikoryo's smile faded before turning to the still shadows.  
  
"Don't waste too much time on this one, we have bigger youkai to kill. After we have finished here, our next courpse shall be the Taiyoukai of the Western Lands. Does this serve a problem with you, Kagome?"  
  
Her two-toned eyes flickered to his face, the depths of them dulled by the magic of the black jewel. Her mask had not fallen, but the bright demon knew that her lips twitched once in thought, before he so gracefully fueled her thoughts with visions of Sesshomaru doing wrong against her. Of course most of them came from her own memories, before the two had kindled some sort of friendship between them.  
  
"None whatsoever Lord Kikoryo."  
  
With a turn of her heel, she positioned her body towards the direction of the retreating bear youkai's presence. Pushing off the ground so that she glided through the winds, a few feet from the ground, she took off after him. Kikoryo watched her with amused eyes before turning almost completely around, and starting towards the Western Lands. Once he defeated Sesshomaru, he would start with the other lands.  
  
The two spirits sitting upon the dense cloud were silenced in dread. They had seen the awkward but intense scene between Sesshomaru and Kagome after her bathe. They had seen how seperation had effected them both, and when they had seen Sesshomaru's tears, they thought for sure that a new relation would spark. They were stunned to say the least with Sesshomaru's angry reaction, and how far Kagome retreated back into herself. Their fear only escalated when Kagome fought back with her words and fled. They had seen everything that had happened, and neither one could understand how to right everything that had gone wrong.  
  
"Will Kagome-sama return to Sesshomaru?"  
  
Shippou turned to look at the sad-ridden girl.  
  
"Under her own compulsion? She might have once her anger died down, but now that she is under the spell of the black jewel, I'm not quite sure anymore. Kikoryo is fueling her anger towards your Sesshomaru by feeding her visions both true and false. He's just like Naraku."  
  
Rin stayed huddled close to the kitsune, and he seemed as if he might need the closeness as well. Their plans were starting to dissolve. Kagome and Sesshomaru were their only way to live once again, and if they never united, Rin and Shippou would not be given another chance for a long while to come.  
  
"Shippou-sama, I'm scared. Rin does not want to stay a spirit for so long. Rin wants to be with Fluffy and Kagome-same. We were going to be a family!"  
  
Her expected tears finally came from her soft brown eyes. Shippou could feel his own prick at his bright green eyes, but he would not let them fall. He would be a man for once. He wrapped an arm reassuringly around her shoulder and patted her back tenderly.  
  
"Do not worry Rin-chan, all will work out for the best."  
  
He pulled his eyes back to the scene of Kagome's form flickering through the tree's shadows, her prey straight ahead. Before she could land her vicious attack on the bear youkai, the scene faded away.  
  
Despite his constant commands to ignore the disappearance of the miko, Sesshomaru had sent many demon scouts and warriors of different calibur to find the whereabouts of Kagome. Report after report came back with devasting news. She could not be found, and neither could her trail be picked up. It was as if her being just suddenly disappeared. That is, until he received one last report, where a demon had picked up the scent of her dried blood. The poor demon had returned with a piece of Kagome's clothing, which had crusted over with her vital blood. The demon had barely enough time to extract himself from the office before Sesshomaru exploded. The miko youkai's blood had been spilled, and from it's scent, it was an extreme wound. Was she laying somewhere dying from blood-loss? Was she hoping he would find her and rescue her? Did she even care? _'Of course she does you fool. She has to care if she was falling in love with you.'  
_  
The voice did not seem to anger the taiyoukai, but instead it's voice made the silver head dip down in despair. He had been the one to push her away, he had been the one that had made her flee. And now she was gone, maybe even dead, and Sesshomaru had not been given the chance to return her sentiments. He was in love with her, and as much as he would like to deny it over and over again, it would never leave. And, it was not just because she was suddenly a youkai, even if she turned back to human, he would still love her. No matter what form she took, she was always Kagome.  
  
His thoughts were interrupted when one of his warriors bursted through his office doors. Sesshomaru might have ripped his throat out, had he not felt the urgency and fear that was rolling off of the man in front of him. He was out of breathe, which was strange for a demon, and sweat had begun to trickle down his face.  
  
"Lord Sesshomaru, we have spotted the demon Kikoryo. He has made his intentions very clear. He wishes to destroy you, and has killed every warrior that we send against him. There is a black shadow that falls him, and none of our weapons will pass it by to hit it's target."  
  
Kikoryo. The demons name had spread quickly over all the lands like liquid fire over the past few weeks. Humans and demons alike seemed to shudder with the mention of the name. For Sesshomaru, it only annoyed him, it was another set-back to his mission to find Kagome. He had heard rumors that the demon had the Shikon No Tama in his possession, but from the demonic aura that was approaching him, Sesshomaru could not feel any spikes of power that seemed abnormal. Besides, Kagome was the one who possessed the jewel and Sesshomaru doubted that......  
  
His eyes snapped open at the thought, jerking the demon in front of him back a few steps in fear. _'No, it can't be.'_ He rose to his full height and was instantly running out of his home and into the forest ahead. If Kikoryo did have the jewel, Kagome must have fallen to his hands. 'Do not think of it yet, it could still just be a falsehood.' It did not take him far till he saw the moon glitter off of the whiteness of the demon approaching him.  
  
"Hello Lord Sesshomaru. I am glad you were able to meet me on the battlefield instead of me having to drag you out of your home to fight you. I hope I am not disappointed with the fight you give. I have been terribly upset at the small resistance that has been given to me. Not much of a fight don't you say?"  
  
The pale face was pulled back into a wicked smile, the silver eyes glittering with the need for power. Oh yes, he wanted the Western Lands bad. Sesshomaru was the most powerful demon of the lands, and to get rid of him first would only solidify his victory over the other cardinal lands. This did not seem to bother the taiyoukai, he only wished to know of Kagome at the moment.  
  
"Tell me demon, is it true that you possess the Shikon No Tama? I feel no large amount of power from you."  
  
The silky voice was cold and icy as he narrowed his eyes to the bright demon. His mask was back up full force, and therefore his eyes had frozen to the harsh gold. He barely took into notice the shadow that seemed stuck against Kikoryo's side. No doubt the dark assassin that the rumors had also told of. He senses did not pick up much from the obvious demon in the darkness. Either the demon was already dead and animated by the power of the jewel, or it's soul had been locked away.  
  
"Oh yes, the Shikon No Tama. The jewel that gives power, grants wishes, the jewel that was protected by Midoriko, then by Kikyo....and now protected by the miko youkai Kagome? Have I gotten this all straight?"  
  
He pulled his pale hands to his chin, in a wicked immitation of thoughtful depth. He twisted his eyes around as if he thought of how to put his next few words that he spoke, before drawing in air and giving a soft chuckle.  
  
"Why yes, I do believe that I have the jewel in my possession. I'm sure it would bother you to know that I had to rip it out of your precious Kagome's side in order to have it. If it would please you to know, she did not scream out in pain, but she did fight like a wildcat. I'm afraid she was just too weak from her anger. You know, that for one moment she hated you, and her hatred corrupted the jewel."  
  
A dark glow emmitted from Kikoryo's midsection, the dark jewel making it's presence known. He had yet to notice that the taiyoukai's eyes had bleed to red already. He was angered, to know that Kagome had been injured, and was probably now dead. Under that anger, his heart was bleeding with pain and despair, and underneath that, he was hurt that she had hated him for even a split second. Kikoryo would die for what he had done to Kagome. He did not give a battle cry, nor say anything witty as he leapt from the ground, rushing his body towards Kikoryo with a growl ripping from his throat. He could see his target getting closer, and yet did not realize that Kikoryo was smiling.  
  
Before Sesshomaru's outstretched claws could slice into the bright demon, a darkness flashed across his vision and he was brought to a halt. A slim hand was wrapped around his wrist, and a body was blocking his movements. At first he refused to look towards the person, his only target was Kikoryo, but when the flutter of fabric tickled his ears, and he saw black hit the ground, he turned his gaze. Before him was standing a youkai, a female youkai. Her hair was long and ebony, streaked with snow white. Her eyes were almond, and long eyelashes framed her two-toned gaze. Her skin was fair and pale, her body was clothed. He should know her, but the gaze she let fall on him was not one that he had in his memory. Her gaze was murder, she glared at him with hate, and he could see his death in the eyes. The red left his eyes, and he stuttered as his arm went slack.  
  
"Kagome?"  
  
"Ah yes, I forgot to tell you Lord Sesshomaru. She would have probably died by my hand, but I found her too convenient. How likely is it that I will come across a miko youkai once again? Not very likely I can tell you. She would make a perfect guard, to kill those that came after me. A shard of the black jewel embedded in her body, and therefore I control her. I have fed her anger and hate with so many gruesome pictures of what you have done to her. She has forgotten her love for you, she only see's her hate."  
  
The miko's eyes never faltered, and her body never did budge. She was a marble statue, and her strength was much more than Sesshomaru would have thought, even with the presence of the jewel. He moved, twisting to the side, making his wrist slide in her grasp before he broke away. He did not attack, but instead retreated back. No, he couldn't hurt Kagome, he would not forgive himself if he did. Instead his golden gaze was sent back to rest on Kikoryo.  
  
"She has forgiven me for the past, you fed her nothing but lies. And you are a coward just like Naraku by hiding behind her. You have all of the jewel and the powers, why not use it and leave Kagome out of this."  
  
Neither of the male demons noticed the flicker in the blue and golden eyes when her name was said by Sesshomaru. To either of their gazes, she had returned to her status beside Kikoryo, her face emotionless. Somewhere of course, the soul of Kagome was trying to fight back, to fight against the power of the shard at the base of her throat. She could see all that had happened, and yet none of the bloodshed and death had effected her as much as seeing Sesshomaru had.  
  
"Do not feed me such pathetic words. I was right when I suspected that you would not hurt the miko. You have feelings for her do you not? To think that the taiyoukai was brought down by a female. I thought the Icy Lord was incapable of love? That is what it is, isn't it?"  
  
The words drew Sesshomaru into a blank. True, when he had thought he was speaking with Kagome, he had said he was in love with her, but was it wise to admit it to the bright demon in front of him? What did it matter, Kikoryo already knew the answer. Shifting his gaze to Kagome, running his eyes all over her in desperation, he could not deny that he did love her, and even now with her as one of his opponents, he still loved her. He kept his gaze on the miko as he spoke.  
  
"Her name is Kagome. Not miko, not wench, not youkai. _Ka-Go-Me_. And yes, it is true that I have feelings for Kagome. But you are wrong, it isn't just love. I feel respect towards her, I admire her. She astonishes me and leaves me guessing at everything that she does. Once I think I may have her figured out, she draws the fog over my eyes once again. I feel pain for all that she has gone through, and I feel anger for not having known her as I do now sooner."  
  
Kikoryo's white eyebrows shot upwards, his mouth moving into a smirk. His pale lips opened to say something in return, but Sesshomaru pulled his hand up.  
  
"Shut your mouth, this Sesshomaru is not done. I feel like I should try and protect her from everything that would do her wrong, no matter who it is. I would fight the Kami if it did her wrong. And I feel grateful that I have been able to earn her friendship, and that I have been able to give mine back. Yes Kikoryo, you are right, this Sesshomaru loves Kagome."  
  
He fell silent, his eyes staying on the form of Kagome. He had hoped that he would see a reaction from her, and yet he saw none. Was she truly so deep under the spell of the shard that she could not hear him? He blinked once, letting his gaze shift to the bright demon, and in his actions, he missed it. Kagome could and did hear everything that the taiyoukai had said, and if he had been looking longer he would see her eyes flicker, see her eyelids transcend down and blink. Then tears would start to form and spill down her cheeks. Sesshomaru. She watched as he launched himself once again towards Kikoryo, and she moved as well. Thought this time her path was not towards Sesshomaru, but towards the bright demon himself. She reached him before the taiyoukai, and before the bewilderment in Kikoryo's eyes could register, she had shoved her clawed hand into his abdomen. Her claws clutched at the Shikon No Tama, and then she felt the hands of the taiyoukai on her shoulders. She was so close to ripping the jewel from Kikoryo's body, so close, before she realized to late that a blade flashed across her vision. She was ripped back, pain flaring across her chest. A dark light exploded as the dark Shikon No Tama was split in two. One half in Kagome's bloody hand, the other shining through the gaping hole in Kikoryo.  
  
A gasp was sounded as Kagome landed next to Sesshomaru, her head snapping back against the rocky earth. She saw Kikoryo grab at the bloody hole and disappear with fright in his eyes. She was barely aware of Sesshomaru moving against her, trying to speak with her, before the pain in her body overwhelmed the last of the dark jewels spell and she collapsed into unconsciousness.

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Authors Note: I apologize for how long it has taken me to make this chapter. I am glad that I actually stuck through it and typed as much as my brain could handle. I hope it is satisfactory with my readers. Also I wish to apologize that I do not thank each reviewer myself, but I soon will.

Kikoryo will return of course.


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